Sports Believer Pillows

"Oh, wait. He's on their side."

I like the Jets...I guess

'I'll make my final decision on that promotion of yours, after this game.'

"Break his third chakra!" "Knock the dharma out of him!"

'My feet are killing me.'

Church for sports worshipers.

"Still, diving for it would look good on my college application.

'Another expectant father looking forward to paternity leave.'

'Look around, son. See if there's one you like. But remember: These are abandoned players, unwanted by their teams - so they might come with some psychological baggage.'

'What distance! Pity it wasn't the hammer!'

'I'm not abandoned. I'm a free agent.'

'Originally he was the mascot until we discovered he had a golden foot.'

If nobody had invented graphics

"I was sent down to the minors and from there to Europe, and one thing just led to another."

"I never knew God was such a sports fan."

Football Chameleon

"Lautrec or Gary? Hmmm... We'll take Gary."

"He tested positive for a new fever ... TB12."

"Lordy, I am such a klutz!"

Mixed Doubles.

Saving a Heart

"Let's get ready to bumble!"

Ratminton

Gary turns 40.

"How should we divide the teams?"

'We need you to get onto those high balls coming over'

At the 2021 Religious Games

"You'll have to help out here more. I pulled a hammy jumping over the moon."

Bobby's pitching coach told him to put some stank on the ball.

A day at the transgenic races