Sports Bar Regular Mugs

"How about we settle your tab from the regular season?"

Bro Rabbit

Sports Bar: 5-7 pm No Bullying During Happy Hour.

'He is our darts team captain,he always finishes on a double.'

'They've made this 3D football really realistic, it even chucks coins at you.'

"Blowing the whistle is perfect for a sports bar to let its patrons know that Happy Hour is over."

"Your food didn't melt, young man... this is the soup course."

"Waitress, have you smoked salmon..?"

"And I'll also take my steak raw thank you."

'No ice.'

'I never should have ordered the diet platter.'

"Tonight, perhaps Mrs. Lewis would prefer this quiet little table for two from which to send back her entrée?"

"Rump roast?"

"You know how it is, one minute I'm selling insurance in South Dakota and the next minute I have a hook for a hand. How about you?"

"Can you come back? We're still counting carbs."

"Ladies first. Actually, it's safety first. But ladies are definitely a close second."

I'd like to take this menu and shove it where the sun don't shine. But I'll settle for the omelette & hash browns...

"All of tonight's specials dance around the whole GMO thing."

'I'm sure M'lady will appreciate the mashed potatoes. Our chef uses only grass-fed single-udder butter.'

Check your universal remote control at the door.

"Wait, those crunchy, cheesy little fish thingies are free?!"

"Waiter, there's a weapon of mass destruction in my soup!"

"I know my drinking limits.The problem is that I can never reach them - I simply fall down."

"I need to increase my salary so I can increase my spending."

"I'll have the barbecued half-pounder, with all the ramifications."

'Men order. . . women shop.'

"We have; pulled pork, enticed chicken, persuaded lamb, bullied beef, cajoled Turkey..."

"Are these prices?" "No, that's our Calorie-fixe menu."

'The beef has been genetically modified to make it taste like a more expensive cut.'

I wish I'd had the review.

"And would you like flies with that?"

"I'll have the spaghetti, does that come on toast?"

'Do you want me to get the fish bone out, or not?'

'Hey, pal... do you have a wine that tastes like beer?'

"I forget to drink."