Sporting Theatrics Admirer Pillows

Don't be fooled by the theatrics. She'll only suck your sap!

Silly wig.

Sir Joseph Porter, KCB, First Lord of the Admiralty HMS Pinafore

Spiro & Pusho illusionists

"All those training sessions, seminars and studies... ... to reinforce the reality of womens equality and extirpate any remnants of a deluded belief in male superiority When all we had to do was show them Rachel Daly doing a bicycle kick GASP!"

Wilfried Zaha

"Lord Stanley's Cup...and Bailey"

Football Sculpture.

'Feeeeeeeeed me, Seymooooooooor.'

"You'd like a book by Shakespeare? Certainly sir - which one. . .?"

"Just wait until my autobiographical one-woman show."

Rugby Mad.

'I want to be a professional Polo player too when I grow up...Can I have your autograph please?'

"Sergeant - I'm going over the top..."

'A fat little man with a red cloak' (Braham at St James' Theatre)

News of the Day - History, reviewed and corrected by the operatta - 'Come on! Two Chilperies and Agamemnon!

'A Bird of Paridise' - A head-dress in 1780

"Tonight's performance has been canceled, because the star of our show has decided that musicals are stupid."

"Remember, you're a 17-year old fashion model. Now go out and act like you've never acted before."

"The post-touchdown celebrations are getting out of hand."

Father Christmas.

'Couldn't you have just gone goth like your brother?'

'If it's alright with your agent, Kolwalski, I'd like to hand the ball off to you.'

Sergio Aguero

'The bad news is he wants to be a jockey.'

Hercules Poirot meets Pierrot

Mic Drop

A man standing in the rain

"I'm playing Santa in the Christmas play. I need a pillow and eight tiny reindeer by Friday."

Masked Admirer