Spooky Spirit T-Shirts

'I have to disappoint you Mrs Robinson, today is not Halloween.'

"Home depot."

'Trick or treater' wears mask which is identical to man's face.

'What do you call a pair of ghostly glasses?...Spectre-calls!'

"One more question, Mr Cake. How do you feel about wearing a sheet, creeping about people's bedrooms and saying 'woo'?"

Will scare for candy.

Vampire

No Guts. No Gory

A vampire sitting on a park bench at night feeding bats.

"Maybe if we added some pumpkin spice?"

Get on with it!

Classic Emojis for sale.

'I, Dom Perignon, will now uncork the very first bottle of Champagne. Of course, I'm just guessing this is the right way to do it.'

"Yeah, vertical cemeteries are helping urban sustainability. But going by haunted cemetery standards ... kinda lame."

Monster Horrorscopes

"He turned on, dropped out and never came back, it's 50 years since woodstock and he still thinks that's a mirror."

Satan

"I want to make it with you."

Rational explanations

'Being a migrating bird is great: My life is like an endless summer...'

'Take some more. You need the calories.'

"New York is a place of free spirits."

The fact he was a neutered housecat never stood in the way of Mr. Whiskers' dream.

'I waxed the runners.'

Morgue.

'Do you kids know the story of 'The Big Mongoose'?!'

'I'm going back as a ghost. It's time to give something back to the community.'

"We're not the type of ghosts he's afraid of. It's ghosting from the person he met on that dating site that he's afraid of."

"Prosecco-ho-ho?"

"It was a hot, humid night and he was floating around in the dark and didn't hear it!..."

"Don't you just love the way these old houses creak?"

Monster in shape of letter C.

'Take no notice, it's only the poltergeist. He does it for attention.'

Dracula Flipping Frankenstein a Bat

"Don't worry. I'm just here to kill the buzz."