Spiritual Thinker Pillows

"Jitters on Wall Street today over rumors that Alan Greenspan said, 'A rich man can as soon enter Heaven as a camel fit through the eye of a needle.' "

"O.K., so the meek shall inherit the earth, and the rich will have a hard time getting into Heaven. But what about the middle class?"

The day after the meek inherit the Earth.

'...if you think about it, we must have done something pretty bad in a past life.'

"Your son is asking a lot of questions about the giant hands in the sky that controls everything."

"What does God do with all that prayer data?"

"I may have wasted my life, but at least I don't look stupid."

'Er... vicar - does the church have a position on the donation of GM vegetables for the Harvest Festival?'

'It's some kind of open-source thing -- He's giving them free will.'

"No, I didn't give them free will just to evade responsibility!"

Pray as you Go.

'Satan wants to meet you on Main Street at high noon.'

'Let he who is without sin, cast the first stone.'

'I'd like to think I made a difference.' -'Arrogant jackass.'

"Which God are you praying to? The one who caused the tragedy or the one who did nothing to stop it?"

Sign in Heaven: BEWARE OF NOTHING

Can someone please tell me why they call this Good Friday?

Angel sees FIRE EXIT sign on trap door in cloud.

"You were only thankful on Thanksgiving."

'A word of warning - don't believe everything you hear!'

'What about the commandment about doing unto others as you would have them do unto you?'

The Pope.

The Bathroom of Jesus and His Bride

'It's the Kukulkan witnesses inviting us to read the Popol Vuh.'

Good news: Bible...Bad noose.

'Sometimes I scare myself when I realize that I always was and always will be.'

'This stuff is all well and good son, but when are you going to get a proper job?'

Spying on Heaven

"One of the proofs we have that God has a wonderful sense of humor is that atheists talk about God almost much as Christians do."

"We'll release it under, 'fictional short stories'... it's not like anyone is going to take this literally."

"It's such morally uncertain times, a good attorney should ask himself 'Who would Jesus sue?'"

reincarnated worm...

Wash hand before making sound of one hand clapping.

Baby Jesus

"What a pity you couldn't bring it with you - I just got word that you won the lottery."