Spiritual Rejuvenator Pillows

'This is my grandmother. She's getting a faith lift this week.'

"Soul searching? Yes, you could call it that."

'It's a nice idea. A bit rough around the edges but I'm sure it will evolve given time.'

'I hate to be so skeptical, but I still think the seance business is a hoax!'

"Ooh, ooh, I know this koan! I got it! Pick me! Pick me!"

'He who laughs last probably doesn't get it.'

"Home depot."

"When you say the meek will inherit the earth, does that include the mineral rights?"

"You seem troubled, Pastor. Is anything worrying you...I mean aside from the sins of the world, the vanity of humankind, man's inhumanity to man..."

'You have to Marvell eh - 'annihalating all that's made to a green thought in a green shade.''

A sturdy hand-hold against the vicissitudes of life: $1.00 per minute.

"Honey, I’ve found God!"

"Tell her she's dead. I don't want to talk about the relationship."

Jesus's First and Less-Heralded Miracle Walk,

'You must heal yourself.'

'We never go anywhere together except here.'

Kissing the Blarney Stone.

'Eve wants a second opinion about the apples.'

"Yes, alright! I know it's a small mountain... I'm only a novice oracle."

Christian and Born again Christian...

"You wanted the magic back in our relationship..."

Madame Lucille - Fortune Teller 'I predict the future'.

"I see you're an ex televangelist who would like to stay in sales."

Proceed no further if chakras not aligned.

'St. Joseph's Church,today's sermon, the road to heaven (free maps)'

"Would you like to leave a message? He's on the throne"

The Path

"Did you have a cat?"

"All the celebrities come here."

"I often consult with a higher authority... my grandmother."