Spiritual Finance Enthusiast Pillows

"Be mindful of the pennies and the pounds will be mindful of themselves."

"Dad, this is Wendy, she's going to re-negotiate my allowance!"

"Try not to think of them just as a 'customer' but rather as your only chance of paying your mortgage and putting food on your plate."

'You're my economic advisor. What'll I do?'

SERMONS 'R' US - everything for the clergy.

"Because of the economic situation they've relaxed the rules."

'While your word is your bond, at this point it's a junk bond.'

'Come back in two months the meaning of life can change, depending if the market is bullish or bearish.'

New Age Office Supplies Catalog.

'I don't believe in hoarding cash and gold Dad: I invest in shares online...'

"Before we discuss your loan, Mr Carlson, perhaps you'd like to spend a few moments with out bank chaplain."

'What's the difference between exchange-traded derivatives and swaps?'

"Fiscal conservatism be damned. I'm a fiscal hedonist."

'Maturity: the instant-degratification phase of life.'

'Remember son: not a borrower but a lender be.'

Past Performance in No Guarantee of Future Results.

Unchanged … and yet completely changed. Tao Jones Indexes.

"You know it almost BEGGARS belief that so many people are unwilling to pay for professional pension advice."

'Sell during a boom; buy during a bust - that sounds more like Warren Buffett instead of Buddha.'

"I spent all last year totally paralyzed with indecision about a career - isn't that some kinda tax deduction?"

Buddha Statue: Buy Low, Sell High, Stay Diversified.

"What grade would you like - basic, better or best?"

I'm going to say my prayers. Should I play the same lotto numbers?

How to bare up in a bare market.

Vending Machine: Epiphanies... Now in six yummy varieties!

Apostle shopping at 'Aeroapostle' Store.

'Do you have any oranges?'

Our nest egg hatched into a new ski boat.

'Not a good time to ask for more allowance. They're discussing the national debt.'

"To mediate properly, you need a mantra. How about 'the Dow is up'?"

'I'd say my client's position was more agitated than distressed.'

'In life I was scorned for worshipping the Almighty Dollar.'

"Do you want to add something about not trying to time the market?"

'We found the trouble Mr. Spencer. Your credit is no good!'

"Why do you want to invest in oil futures?"