Spirited Sippers Pillows

"Is the vodka fresh?"

'If this is tea, I'll have a coffee. If it's a coffee, I'll have a tea!'

"I forget to drink."

"The Ususal, Mr. B?"

'We're drinking to our round of golf...one shot at a time.'

'It has to breathe for exactly 22 minutes; then I can pour you a glass - right after the sacrifice.'

The Stumble Inn Bar & Grill

'I'm not as think as you drunk I am.'

"And would you like a wine stopper?"

Gosh dern it, Cookie! Thanks to you the boys won't punch cattle without a frothy cup of yer Mesquite Caramel Cappuccino!

"The 'Ex' huh?"

Happy hour.

'Boozer's Week.'

'No I don't do decaf, soy lattes with a shot of vanilla!'

Scariest Tactics

"You know, after all these years of giving you advice on all. Things personal and professional, it occurred to me that you've never actually asked for my opinion."

Man battles for his life against 'A Very Lively Little Red'

"The champagne aisle always makes me cry. Just look at all this imprisoned happiness!"

Nappy Hour 2-3.

"For those of you visiting our church for the first time just raise your hand and our ushers will refresh your coffee."

"Single malt scotches are good but I prefer regular old comfort booze."

The wine was fruity and quite lively.

"Bartender - givish me another shot."

Old man with straw in gin.

'Maybe you're sitting on the wrong end.'

'The wife and I have decided to nominate our weekly drink-free days as tomorrow and the day after tomorrow.'

"A cheeky little wine, would you agree?"

Christmas drinker

'Prayer services held in pub' "Same again please..."

"To the gentleman in the back, at four pounds, last bottle of gin in all Khartoum!"

Tea Shop.

'Happy hour, drinks half price'

'Lance, the more I drink the funnier you get!'