Spinning Sensation Gifts

"Notice how Dad ages faster at relativistic speeds?"

"Excellent, excellent. A fine blend of truths, half-truths, and blatant falsehoods."

"...And do you Sean Spicer take Kelly Anne Conway..." "The marriage of alternative facts"

'Fred, I want you to sanitize this, punch it up, dumb it down, leak it to the media and then be fully prepared to deny it!'

Danae's Career Plans: 'The major product manufactured today is punditry, so I'm honing my argumentative skills to work my way to the top of the blow hard industry..my goal is to become a spin ninja...'

'Which sounds better: 'now with MORE XZ100' or 'now with LESS XZ100'?'

"All this spinning...shouldn't this be charging our phones or something?"

Public Relations: Reputations cleaned and repaired

Arts and crafts

Boy swinging on wrecking ball swing: 'Stu had a future in demolitions.'

CONGRESS, 'No, no, you don't HAVE to fool all of the people all of the time - you just need to CONFUSE them!'

"What's important is that we learn from what we must never admit happened."

"We're looking for the kind of bad taste that will grab - but not appall."

'That's the new guy. He writes our 'shuck-and-jive' press releases.'

'Staffers don't report we're managing decline. They report we met our targets and did out job!'

"I'm not spinning - I'm contextualizing."

"I think I'm in the wrong kind of spin class!"

'It has been revealed that a senior politician will criticise something in a speech. Later they will criticise the opposite of something, just in case.'

The Truth

Chinese History: Redwash

"There sits the unvarnished truth. Now, how shall we interpret it to our advantage?"

'I don't know whether these are good grades or not. The teacher calls them unique.'

'Your job, Richards, is to make sure that my name never appears in a headline alongside the word 'siphoned.''

"Looks like he's coming around to our way of thinking."

"Prospectus in not spelt P...R...O...A...G...A...N...D...A."

'Sir, what comes first ??" the buzz or the spin?'

Have our P.R. people do a report on the beneficial effects of cyanide on river life.

"I work in PR where I provide a dynamic and highly effective bespoke service that can work for you and blah blah blah ..."

'Hold on, pal! Who's in control of the narrative here?'

"Three years running 'fake news' websites? You're just what we're looking for!"

"I just spoon-fed the media a pound of really old salmon."

"I didn't know you could get a PhD in Spin."