Speleologist Gifts

'Nothing is what it seems down here. Most people are nudist speleologists, but I lobby for the pharmaceutical industry.'

Nudist speleologists' convention

Speleologist

Another long day down at the Bureau of Earthquake Prediction.

'Is there another doctor in the house? He wants a second opinion.'

The Tectonics and Their Plates.

Some unusual family photographs decorate podiatrist's desk.

'... Going once...going twice...aaaand--sold! To the gentleman in the front row for a thousand words.'

"Would you mind adjusting the vibrate on your phone? There's a seismologist on TV claiming there's been an earthquake in our neighborhood."

Medical Examinations.

'Gastroenterology...do I know that?'

Overcrowding's becoming a real problem in our penal system

"Once again, the epicenter seems to be Christian Slater."

"How do you spell, asteroid?"

"Doctors, Gilby, Beam and Henson. Ears, nose and throat."

"By the way, does anything other than 'trouble' rhyme with 'bubble'?"

'This potion will get you promoted but I can't guarantee a bonus.'

Proctologists' Office Party Games

'I'm referring you to a specialist who isn't as afraid to die as I am.'

"I see the man who invented autocorrect has died."

Friedrich Nietzsche

'The bad news is you have a disease that only a highly-paid specialist can pronounce.'

"I lost the spelling bee on the word 'gangsta.' "

'Didn't I tell you to take up some hobby other than opera?'

"Melisa! - Your spelling is atrocious!"

A proctologist by trade, Bob liked to spend his weekends out in nature.

'Of course, simple mistakes can be done by anybody, but to really mess up things, you need a specialist: me, the IT consultant!'

"Anybody know how to spell anarchy?"

"Eye of newt, wing of bat, blah blah blah, here's one I made earlier."

Could you be a little bit more specific than an 'arm and a leg'?

'I was hoping you could help me with an implant.'

Maid revealing that the judge uses a dictionary when writing

Trust Your Doctor

After years of pointless therapy, Morris took up speleology and finally found himself.

'Tell me a little bit about yourself.'