Speed Limit Comedian T-Shirts

"You were doing 10 knots over the limit."

"I need to tinkle."

It's only firing on 87 cylinders!

'Do you know how fast you were going?'

'You wanted a speedy trial, so I'm sentencing you to a swift kick.'

Moses comes to Los Angeles.

"Ma'am, do you realize how fast you were... going?"

"Good news, sir – your carry-on has been upgraded to business class."

"This is Siri. No, you're not there yet!"

"Hey! Buddy! This is an interdimensional 4/3π way stop!"

Give Way To Cyclists

'Let him go. We'll catch him in the backstretch. Hippos can run faster than humans, but only in short bursts.'

Riding instructor waits to fish a child out of jumping obstacle.

"Your new car won't start? Oh, well, umm…that's just the car's Collision Avoidance System kicking in. It doesn't want you to hit anything today."

"Drat! A flat tyre. . ."

Danger: Reading warning signs costs lives.

Pine tree driving a truck with a human-shaped air freshener hanging off the mirror

'Do you remember what make of car it was, sir? -- We'll have to order parts.'

'I swear this self driving car is falsifying it's records to avoid an insurance rate hike."

'We learned one thing today - NO parking on the yellow lions!'

'A metal plate in your head does not qualify as a helmet.'

"Over the speed limit, are you sure?"

'When is everyone else going to be driven off the road?'

Man crashes his car before leaving the driveway because he forgot his glasses.

'Until 1989 I never had an accident...then I bought a car.'

'Surely you can't book me for laughing, officer'

'I don't need a computer to tell me I failed to fasten my seat belt or release the emergency brake.'

'Mr. Evans, it's a speeding ticket. You can't pleas insanity.'

"The test calls for a pirouette, sir. Arabesques don't really tell us enough."

'Why do they call it the school RUN Mummy?'

'There's a delay on the expressway: A truck loaded with peanut butter is spread across three lanes causing a traffic jam.'

Pedestrian Corridor