Speed Demon Gifts

'Safety zone ends, resume driving like idiots.'

"It's for you - it's my lawyer."

Steep learning curve ahead.

Out Of My Way, Stupid!

Id/Ego/Superego.

"Is this a bad time to talk about global warming?"

"$100 for speeding and $250 for misleading the public."

'Can we speed this up? I'm in a hurry.'

'A spoiler is standard on all sports cars. It helps protect your hair transplant.'

Mike was definitely having a mid-wife crisis.

Sports car.

Speed camera: 'Police fund-raiser, please increase your speed now.'

Speed Bumps.

Duck with outboard motor.

'It was HIS fault, he was doing the SPEED LIMIT!'

'With the sleep, low x-39, you get a free list of local chiropractors.'

'Why do I have to keep proving myself?!'

'You were speeding.' - 'That's right. To get away from reckless drivers.'

"I can't believe we forgot to pack the car."

A rally car crashes into hay bales.

Driver under instruction

Speeding school bus.

How's my driving? Ace Care Home 0777333

'You were going too slow...then you were going too fast. You hit every pothole and you're making the turns too wide. And another thing...'

'If I look a little pale, it's because I just sold enough blood to buy new tires for my bike.'

'But isn't it nice to know you can go 2500 miles per hour in a pinch?'

"That salesman was right. This company does ship orders fast!"

'I thought forty is the new thirty.'

"This baby can take you from zero to cardiac arrest in 60 seconds!"

Formula one winner runs through finish line,

"So have you ever experienced anything that went from 0-70 in the blink of an eye?"

'What speed bump?'

Road-rage speedometers.

'I clocked you doing 67 in a 45, but maybe we can work something out.'

"You're right! We can run faster with shaved legs!"