Speed Demon Gifts

'Safety zone ends, resume driving like idiots.'

"It's for you - it's my lawyer."

Steep learning curve ahead.

Out Of My Way, Stupid!

Id/Ego/Superego.

"Is this a bad time to talk about global warming?"

'Can we speed this up? I'm in a hurry.'

"$100 for speeding and $250 for misleading the public."

'The test results are in. The tightness in your chest and numbness in your extremities are caused by the biking outfit you're wearing.'

'A spoiler is standard on all sports cars. It helps protect your hair transplant.'

0 - 60 in seven seconds flat.

Mike was definitely having a mid-wife crisis.

Duck with outboard motor.

'With the sleep, low x-39, you get a free list of local chiropractors.'

Sports car.

'It was HIS fault, he was doing the SPEED LIMIT!'

Speed Bumps.

Speed camera: 'Police fund-raiser, please increase your speed now.'

'You were speeding.' - 'That's right. To get away from reckless drivers.'

Driver under instruction

Speeding school bus.

"I can't believe we forgot to pack the car."

A rally car crashes into hay bales.

How's my driving? Ace Care Home 0777333

'You were going too slow...then you were going too fast. You hit every pothole and you're making the turns too wide. And another thing...'

'If I look a little pale, it's because I just sold enough blood to buy new tires for my bike.'

'Why do I have to keep proving myself?!'

"This baby can take you from zero to cardiac arrest in 60 seconds!"

'What speed bump?'

Road-rage speedometers.

'I clocked you doing 67 in a 45, but maybe we can work something out.'

Formula one winner runs through finish line,

'Not bad, 3mn 30s, but you still need to do much better than that...'

"You're right! We can run faster with shaved legs!"

'I thought forty is the new thirty.'