Speech Pattern Lover T-Shirts

"Whu-u-u-u-u-u-u-uht?"

The Art Student.

"You're losing the audience. Switch to the Powerpoint presentation."

'Fine stencilling. But have you never thought - Tit Willow, Tit Willow, Tit Willow?'

Inclusive speech

What's normal?

"Just a brief moment, Linda, to thank you for my delicious meals. And if you need me by your side... just whistle." "What fresh hell is this?"

"Now that I can talk, here's my speaking fee."

'I look forward to a bigger and bolder vision in my 2nd term.'

Changing Minds

Passed over at the Inaugural Poetry Audition

Man admiring his patterned clothes in the mirror

"This is not the first time I have been asked to speak."

"I believe I can create a great presentation if I can only tap into my cognitive dissonance."

"I liked the fee-fi-fo-fum part, but I found the rest of his speech racist and repellent."

"My master's vowel hyperarticulation is wearing a bit thin..."

MLK

'Well ladies and gentlemen, I'm sure my little talk has made you all think'

'Trust me, it's very proper to mix stripes.'

Tonight: Town Hall Meeting. With free speech, sometimes I think that you get what you pay for!

"I'm starting to think stripes."

The Z Chromosome: Zebratic engineering with questionable results.

A. Lincoln, President. The "of the people, by the people, for the people" part is great, Abe, but the "people who need people" section may be overkill.

'Sir, you inaugural speech is simply wonderful. I would just suggest you say 'dear employees' instead of 'hey, you bunch of lousy slaves'.'

'The inaugural address? It's sort of like an opening monologue.'

'I wanted a change in decor.'

Snapshots in Time

'I've never seen anyone lip-sync a speech before.'

Business coach hiding in speach desk.

'I'll try to keep my remarks brief.'

"I would like to thank all the big and little and in between people."

Climate Conference. I'm glad you enjoyed my speech, but please don't call it the "high-water mark."

Making it look easy.

King Madras

'Vote for me because my Super PAC raised lots more money than my opponent's Super PAC.'