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"You know, it would be a lot easier to find my glasses if I had my glasses on!"

"Where else in the world would you get such wonderful sunsets?"

"The university said he was a climate change denier so remove the statue."

'Echo Tourism'

"It's not face paint. I'm transitioning into a snow leopard."

"Do you think that will count as our 'Fifteen minutes of fame'?"

Airplane Mode.

'Hold everything! -- The National Endowment for the Arts changed its mind!'

"Or we could raise your profile by coming out with that pimple on the end of your nose."

Gallery book shop - Rodin's Browser

'Is there a psychiatrist in the house - the cast is very depressed over opening night reviews!'

Hospital Departments

'I'm a star!'

"Outré or simply bad?"

On Champagne: 'Nobody knows the bubbles I've seen.'

'It's Blurred.'

Wish upon a star (well it's worth a try).

'The view is much better on the other side of the bus, we'll sit there on the way back.'

Kapoor & Piss-poor (Anish Kapoor sculpture beside Marcel Deschamps urinal)

"Beats me why but my girlfriend says I have a one-track mind."

"No, it hasn't anything to do with my presentation. But wait until you see how I hold everyone's attention with it sitting next to me at the podium."

"For my next trick, I'll require an audience."

"Thanks for getting me out of the house."

Thanks to an elaborate system of mirrors, every employee at Vecon Industries had a window view.

'Barry I think it's time you had your eyes checked!'

Let's all be fairies.

Rodin's Freemason (unfinished)

"I already noted plenty of beauty on the drive up."

'No thanks. I'm just squinting...'

'Take a picture...it'll last longer.'

Chess on TV

"Sarah, get me my own billboard right across the way. I'd like an office with a nice view."

'So what if we don't have running water?!'

"All I see is more trees."

I think I need new glasses. I swear I just saw a tiny man jump off your bridge.