Spectacle Style Seeker T-Shirts

'Having trouble getting used to your new bi-focals'

'No thanks. I'm just squinting...'

'And with every new pair of glasses you get a cool pair of 3D glasses for free'

'Something for the weekend, Sir?'

'Now that I've lost weight, I can't afford new clothes in my size.'

Two women wearing identical dresses head toward exchange window at department store.

"Can you make wishes on fake eyelashes?"

"Oh to be young and in love and wear things cut on the bias."

Mr. Punch's Fancy Ball

"If the economy's ground to a halt, we can help by carrying on shopping."

Pampered and poodled.

"And now. . . which shoes?"

"Which of these will look the prettiest without the others?"

Life Store Guide: Make-up and jewellery

"I can never get my sunglasses on my head the way my hairdresser does"

'These fit just right. Do you have anything too tight?'

"Are you looking to accentuate or camouflage?"

'They've certainly got designs on your purse!'

"I don't like your application."

Goldilocks and the seventeen black shoulder bags

Mister Pretty Shoes

"Some fitting room. Nothing fits!"

"Do you do much walking?"

"Of course, lots of women are just going bare-headed."

"I feel there's a whole culture around mules."

A member of a very populous consumer group attempts to go shopping...

"You really need to think about getting glasses."

Elegant woman in backless dress.

"It's really quite simple: Shave off the soul patch and the car is yours."

"You won't believe this but I haven't a thing to wear"

'I'll take it!'

Changing Room Decisions

Books / Coffee table books

'Can I have mine with the peak at the front '