Spectacle Savant T-Shirts

"Why do I think you need glasses, Mr. Jones? For one thing...the chart is over this way!"

Opticians.

'My new glasses are going to be expensive, aren't they?'

"And what can I do for you, young lady?"

Felix Mendelssohn

Binge Watch

'Incredibly Inexpensive Sound Engineers. Pretty Good Sound Engineers, 12 the price, 23 the quality. You'll hardly notice the occasional feedback.'

Sir Edward Elgar

Pyramid builders make the Statue of Liberty.

'Theaters from Hell' 'We have no sound engineers, so no there's not a good seat in the house.'

Trawling for Fish.

Antonin Leopold Dvorak

TV Producers Workshop. The first goal of a series to avoid cancellation long enough to issue a DVD set. Get boxed before you get canned!

'Will you hold it down? This is IMPORTANT!'

The Music Lover.

'If you're going to stare at that thing all day, at least watch something educational,,, like Japan,'

Anton Bruckner.

Champagne Tasting.

Baroque

"Here, let me put some ointment on your bug bite. I made it myself from cayenne powder, licorice root and mugwort leaves blended with that vanilla pudding I made last week. Hmm...it's not here."

"I'll be the superhero—you be the guy arguing about him online."

"It's beautiful, isn't it? It will keep you safe."

Sergei Prokofiev.

'Since Darwin said it's survival of the fittest, I thought I'd better take up an aerobic sport.'

Benjamin Britten

'Now cover the other eye & read the same line.'

Henry Moore

'Here's a song that's been done to death.'

"I'm the owner of Happy Pappy's comedy club. Here's my card. Call me."

Space Commando Revenge. Special Effects Extravaganza. It's definitely a "must see" movie … Particularly since there's no dialogue.

Ludwig van Beethoven

'He was offered a role in a sitcom and has the potential to be a successful child actor. We've already set up a legal defense fund.'

"These are my parents, the bingers. Mom binges on shows, and dad on food."

"How many times are young going to playback that last episode of 'Friends'?"

"All right, everybody- time to knock off for lunch."