Spec Master Gifts

"You haven't got dyslexia- the instructions are in polish."

"Same story every morning - 'Can you come and fix our windmill?'..."

Canned laughter for sale in Theatrical Supplies shop.

Girl Band, "I wish you'd tell your mum we don't need her in the group!"

"We structured the deal so it won't make any sense to you."

Man mourns the loss of his king after being checkmated.

'I can't get out! -- I lost the owner's manual!'

'Okay, here's the plan...'

"It's Cinderella?!?"

'A willingness to sacrifice yourself to bring 'peace and succor to the suffering' is all very well Mother Theresa but I don't think it makes up for your lack of knowledge of current hand sanitisation protocols.'

'To find out how to start your new mobile, please read the manual. T' read the manual, please start your mobile.

'Miss Wilson, get on the web and find me everything on bottles!'

"I think I'd be better off trying to figure this out the game on my own."

"The instructions state that some anger, frustration and confusion is expected."

Welcome to Silicon Valley...the user friendly place.

"Have you tried turning it off and on again?"

Dance Studio: Ballroom, Latin, Line Dancing, Rain Dancing

Funky Chef 1

Servant talking to her old master about her new position

"If Labor Day is supposed to be a day off for workers to spend time with their families...I think Tia Carmen needs a day off from Labor Day."

Man using a sherpa - "Admit it father those stairs are getting too much for you."

"For goodness sakes, Harold. Stop preening!"

"Of course I know what the rearview mirror is for...to check at any moment if my hair still looks ok."

'I prefer this way of resolving conflict.'

'You're nice, but I'll need to run your proposal by my attorney, accountant, web master,job coach and HMO.'

Computer shows code violation to wierd user.

'Good. Now slide the 'O' ring over the hubble's sleeve there in front of you.'

"I'm guessing with all that mold coming out of your computer, it's been awhile since you've added fresh content to your site."

The shining light of open-source software.

'Every year was the same. There was always some clown or comedian in Brian's intake of pupils.'

"You can't go on because you're 'feeling funny'? In your case it's so rare, make the most of it!"

'Our Web design company had a financial reversal last month. We made money.'