Spark Chasers T-Shirts

'We're conducting a survey to find out how many married couples still have that old feeling.'

"Happy birthday, dear. You still have that sparkle in your eyes!" "That sparkle burned out years ago. These are cataracts."

'What was that?!' 'A 'Mach'-ing bird.'

"Yoo-hoo. Fifteen minutes of fame is about to start."

"Of course, it may be one of those sting operations!"

"My calculations are complete. We could toast 12,000 marshmallows every day for every person on earth for 36,000 years with one solar flare."

"Sheez. I hope they like pictures of dirt."

Maps to the homes of guys with friends who know some of the limo drivers of the personal trainers of the stars.

"Face it - in this town, either you're a star or you're just another brown dwarf."

Astronaut

Life in the fastest lane.

When the water's colder than you thought...

Still Lives: 'I just need to think of one bright idea and I'll be made for life!'

Man on motorbike.

A Discreet Hint.

'Are you sure this is the only way to get rid of your writers block?'

Athlete being chased by a dog.

The weight of winning gold.

Bon Voyage

"Blueprints for Irish theme pub" found at the end of a rainbow

Match and Heart

Flower tribute

'I'll be in Florida for the winter, but I've sublet my cave to a pair of nice Mormon missionaries.'

"And, of course all our rockets come with a three second warranty."

'He's training for a career in law.'

'Let me guess - You want to be a helicopter pilot?'

'We've created fire! We're Gods!'

'It's no use ... I'll never catch anyone. I can't even catch my breath.'

'Go to Daddy!'

Jetplane flying through clouds.

With one sentence, Harold destroys the leprechaun's reason for being...

Alien hits golf balls off space ship into the moon's craters.

Cross Channel Leap

"His DNA analysis results came back. Turns out he's not even Irish."

"On your mark, get set, go!"