Space-time Travellers Gifts

Blackhole Research.

In his younger days Spock was quite the comedian.

"It's clear to me that you want to go far with this company."

"Let's just say I have a pre-existing condition."

...and then I...wait....What's that?? Whoa! We're on a spaceship! This is fun! Hey! What's this button do? Can I pull this lever? Are we there yet? Take a selfie with us? Do we get snacks? Can I drive? Are we there yet? Something we said? Just imagine if we'd been obnoxious!

"Meet the scribe"

Historical memory is on life support.

"We're following Carrot Top."

If time travel was invented in 1600 in England. I'm a fan of the bard. Let's see if he wants to take a journey through time. Globe Theater. Sounds fun! Let's go to 2020. It's a nice round number. Zazzz! Poof! That's weird. How did they know he was coming? And why does he need to leave this place? Apparently you can't be here, William. The sign says "No Shakespeare in the park this summer."

"So then, after I'd invented my time machine, I thought: why not go back and visit the good old days?"

'That's about it so far, Son.'

The Missing Sock Returns

Second hand furniture.

E=mc2.

Pinocchio's Second Realization

"About how if the dark ages never happened we'd be so much more technologically advanced by now."

How am I abducting?

Sundial Time

'I'd say it's six of one and one half doxen of the other.'

"I can never understand these foreign crop circles."

"Wait... what was it I came up here for?"

Time for vacation, time for work.

'It's good to be here. We're having economic problems where we come from.'

"Early model of baggage claim"

"Please! No harmonizing during ululations!"

Super Strength, Impervious to Bullets And Explosions

Einstein develops his theories that time is relative while ordering at a fast food restaurant.

"Damn. I took the Rip Van Nyquil."

Danger Slow Sand.

'You know what they say - 'Those who don't learn the lessons of history are doomed to go to summer school.''

'I say we invade and secure all those renewable resources.'

"I'm going to prove that Math comes in handy later in life."

"This just in... the country has adopted a 24 hr military clock... ...details at 23."

'When I met him he was all bright and shiny - now he's a rust bucket.'

"I didn't come all this way to do work."