Soup Can Collector Gifts

"Irene's mother warned her about marrying split pea soup."

Recycling station

"This cheap can of domestic beer has a bouquet reminiscent of...beer."

"Hey! There's a hair in my soup!"

"Take 4 teaspoons of this medicine every day. . ."

"Mom, what kind of soup do we eat when we're sick?"

"How do I know if it's fresh?... You asked for 'the soup of the day'. You didn't specify what day."

De ja vu soup - 'It was yesterday's 'soup of the day'.'

Frank and Ernie's Diner. I'll have the beef and tomato consomme from Santiago. Coming up one chilly Chile Chili!

Pet Foods

"A foot bath after a long hard day at work is really nice!"

"My famous chicken soup! The secret ingredient is the rum."

"It's still stew but the celebrity chef wants to call it a deconstructed steak and ale pie with a dusting of salt in a brown sauce coulis."

Heavy syrup

I always wanted a pony. I guess this is as close as I'll ever get. "Waiter, there's a pony in my soup"? It would never work.

'Buck, the town's bein' attacked by tin cans! Sheriff's looking' all over for ya.'

'As a gastroenterologist, what would you take for this soup?'

'Waiter! This broth tastes spoiled!'

"They're in charge because God gave them more can openers."

"Sippy cup holders!"

"Hey, look on the bright side, at least we're not wine coolers."

'I'd like to exchange these cola can tokens for a book on hyperactivity.'

"Do you want me to leave the water in?"

Grocery Store Gravity

A Boy Visits The Rector To Ask For Some Soup.

British Summertime

Lager Drinker.

"There it is again: that red, itchy rash on my skin... Maybe I should try another brand of soap instead of 'Sunlight'?"

"Mom, when will I be old enough to contain alcohol?"

"You run away with me, you run away with my family."

Miscommunication

Man has a can of tuna in his fish bowl.

"Is there soup on this menu?"

'Let's keep it clean'

'This parrot stew keeps repeating on me.'