Soundtrack Selector T-Shirts

" "I decided my life needs a soundtrack. So I programmed my phone to play specific tunes whenever certain people are nearby."

"That's cute, but you'll never realize your phone's ringing in here if your ringtone's a belch."

Musical genres

"I'll have the drum an sea bass, the house salad and the techno nachos!"

Movies vs. Films

'You called me out of the blue... Cobalt, ultramarine, prussian, cerulean or phthalocyanine?'

Birds with Headphones

"It boils down to which I dislike more: ironing shirts or non-iron shirts."

"Trust me, Brad, those comedy sound effects aren't a reflection of how this is going."

"You asked to see me, boss?" "Yes, Rudy. We have a serious problem here." "I'm going to need you to stop humming the 'Star Wars' theme 24/7." "Disney is notoriously litigious. If they catch wind that you're publicly performing the theme, they may sue the cafe for royalties." "Daaaa... daaaa... duh-duh-duh daaaaaaa... daaaa... duh-duh-duh... wait, what?" "If you cost me my livelihood, I'll do to you what Han did to that Tauntaun."

'The bloke with violin is on holiday.'

"Now do you believe me that your snoring wakes up the whole neighborhood?"

'I understand Sir. No, I didn't take that personally, Sir...Could you hold please?'

Resume of Claude Brisketson Composer

Felix Mendelssohn

"You're dragging the beat."

Gioacchino Antonio Rossini

'I know the legal process doesn't really work like it does on TV, but couldn't you at least have a sound track.'

John Fogerty

Georg Frideric Handel

Cook in interview explaining she left her last post because her employee did not like her singing

'OK, Mrs. Grazner! Knock it off with the 'Jaws' sound track!'

'and for my 12,307 choice I'd have the live extended version of...'

What are the odds? I'm listening to Ennio Morricone right now, too!

"Our top story: People all over the world have stopped fighting, and will join together in a chorus of peace and love! This just in: Fighting erupts over what song to sing."

"I know that pretty tune! You're the bloke who tinkles away in all those tv documentaries. Irritating!"

The lame stuff you listen to (yes, you)

For the man who has everything: personal theme music.

Classical music on car commerical

"I can't get the Grease soundtrack out of my head."

Ennio Morricone

'Gee! I liked Muazk better than this laugh track!'

Famed elevator music composer Edward C. Quimble, hard at work.

"School would be more exciting with a sound track."

You asked to see me, boss? Yes, Rudy. We have a serious problem here. I'm going to need you to stop humming the 'Star Wars' theme 24/7. Disney is notoriously litigious. If they catch wind that your publicly performing the theme, they may sue the café for royalties. Daaaa ... daaaa ... duh-duh-duh ... daaaaaaa ... daaaa ... duh-duh-duh ... Wait, what? If you cost me my livelihood, I'll do to you what Han did to that Tauntaun.