Solitary Diners Gifts

Schizophrenic's Romantic Interlude.

"Behold! As I transform this family size frozen lasagna into a meal for one."

'You complimented the chef on his dumplings -now he wishes to return the compliments!'

"I suppose I should have let a few minutes elapse between declaring my love for you and announcing that I also loved lobster."

Table for two. Whom does sir think he's kidding? You're right table for one. Menu.

Martin hated dining alone – but loved the savings.

'Manners are the noises you don't make while you eat.'

'Well actually Fred, it started with just ice cream, then I started selling burgers, drinks and bread and it all got out of hand...'

'I hope when we're older we'll be able to communicate without even speaking words.'

A single man can be seen through the front window of the "ME Only Restaurant".

'Will you be dining alone tonight, Sir?'

Pre Opera Dinners

'OK that's ten pieces of silver each, except for Judas...you had the Greek salad and the cheese platter, so you owe thirty pieces of silver.'

"As a single diner, you will be seated at an awkward table by the restrooms where your lonely presence won't bother other diners."

'This year I'm celebrating Valentines Day by myself, I have to economize.'

Toilet door. Table for one!

'I think tonight's the night. He's taking me to a restaurant where they don't put butcher paper and crayons on your table.'

'Surprise us.'

At The Skinny Customer Restaurant

'A sand wedge. A sand wedge, for crying out loud.'

"Very classy choice for a guy who's eating solo."

'I booked a table for one under the name of Narcissus.'

Eating Alone

'Just because I'm eating alone doesn't mean you should suggest the 'loser' special. But I'll take it.'

"How was your lonely little dinner, sir?"

"The booths are for parties of four or more."

And so begins another evening of serious hobnobbing

Dining Alone

"Sorry, I refuse to eat anything that has a face."

'Oh, i'm actually dining alone. I just prefer this seat.

'Super size mine. Who knows when Mr. Money Bags will take me out grazing again.'

Vegetarian Restaurant.

'...Okay...so who had the thirteen bottles of Chardonnay?'

"Will you be dining with others tonight, or just the company of your smartphone?"

"Table for one" is all you need to know. "One what" shouldn