Solo Dining Gifts

"As a single diner, you will be seated at an awkward table by the restrooms where your lonely presence won't bother other diners."

"Behold! As I transform this family size frozen lasagna into a meal for one."

'A cheeky red?'

"Waiter! Two of your finest menus!"

"It's the sequel to 'Cooking for One'."

"Yes, I'm alone."

Culinary Breakthroughs During Social Distancing

Gwendolyn found herself deep in the Lake district,

Martin hated dining alone – but loved the savings.

'You have to lose weight. Stop having intimate dinners for two, when you are not expecting anyone to join you.'

"Who do you think you're fooling, Henry, smelling the cork and tasting the wine? The only wine you ever buy comes in a box!"

"I'm a vegan. I don't know what made me order a cheeseburger. Maybe I've got the flesh eating disease."

Your own tedious thoughts next 200 miles

'Self service.' 'How much do I tip myself?'

A single man can be seen through the front window of the "ME Only Restaurant".

'Will you be dining alone tonight, Sir?'

Not in the mood for human interaction line

Toilet door. Table for one!

'This year I'm celebrating Valentines Day by myself, I have to economize.'

Eating Alone

Lone traveller is befriended by tourist from hell.

Gone to my cooking for one class - sort out your own dinner.

"Table for a retirement part of one, please."

"Very classy choice for a guy who's eating solo."

"How was your lonely little dinner, sir?"

'Just because I'm eating alone doesn't mean you should suggest the 'loser' special. But I'll take it.'

'Oh, i'm actually dining alone. I just prefer this seat.

Reserved

Dining Alone

"The booths are for parties of four or more."

'You get the feeling we're getting too familiar?'

"Am I the only guy at the table who goes back to when this stuff was two hundred and fifty dollars a bottle?"

"Will you be dining with others tonight, or just the company of your smartphone?"

"I'll have the lonely bastard platter for one please!"

Schizophrenic's Romantic Interlude.