Soil Magician Gifts

Start a miracle

'How fast can you hype?'

"Usually gardeners only have green thumbs, so you must really spend a lot of time in the garden."

"Brilliant report, I can't tell where the facts and the fiction begins"

Garden Shop - Top Soil, Bottom Soil (manure)

"Bob! Your manure's here!"

'That plant food really works!'

Garden Shop: Top Soil. Bottom Soil.

-A garden uses a lot of water. -Most of it perspiration.

Planting veggies

Lazy plumber.

"I say we settle around here, there's no chemical aftertaste to the soil: Must be an organic farmer..."

Garden Talk - "I've decided to do some muck spreading."

Propping up a profits chart.

'And if you squeeze snapdragons just like this, it sort of looks like they're biting something.'

'I know that's what your father calls it, Sweetheart...but a nicer word for it is fertilizer!'

'He may have green fingers, but he's got dirty finger nails!'

Pottery

'Try to relax, Ed. It's a beach, not sandy soil.'

I'm looking for a job?

Earthly Delights Garden Centre

"You forgot to adjust your hilling discs again, didn't you?"

'The Sales Figures for this month aren't looking too healthy - any ideas?'

A misery of mole hills

'So aunt Lois I hear you've developed quite a green thumb.'

"We're looking for fresh, exciting, independent voices which are very similar to those of our existing bestsellers."

"Is this one a flower or a weed? I'm not sure whether to admire it or not."

Gardening Tips - allow worms to drag unwanted organic matter deep into the soil

"Ralph's over-interpreting the data again."

'I'm telling you, with the right moisturizer and lip balm you could avoid all of that chaffing.'

"Excuse me, is this the third turning on the left?"

Right, just off to the east field to muck spread!

"You've got to help me, Tom... my garden is out of control!"