Sofa Finance Strategist Pillows

'We've set the bar quite high at this company. It helps us control bonuses.'

"Our light bill is astronomical living next to a black hole."

"Work hard. Save money. Work hard. Save money. Work hard. Save money. Work hard. Save money. Yay!!! I died rich!"

"Gentlemen, we're missing a great opportunity by not hitching this company to the current tailspin."

"We were able to retire 6 years early by canceling cable & eliminating anything fun."

Will work for ETFs

'Now that we've defined 'happy deficits' let's try it out on the stockholders.'

"Well, either you're hopelessly optimistic or hopelessly short-sighted."

'He's refusing to die as a protest against Inheritance Tax.'

'The recession is over, again.'

'You shouldn't have taken that personal pension.' 'You shouldn't have taken that endowment mortgage.' 'When do you get your free tv license?' Job's comforters, today.

"Well, Comstock, still regret putting our profits back into research?"

"At these tuition prices an acceptance letter is pretty much a denial."

"Ahh... don't you just LOVE that new, re-organized-under-bankruptcy-protection smell?"

'Are we broke yet?'

"I just..."

"Genius is 1% inspiration, 99% budget allocation."

Investing your savings

'Greenspan said today the alert staus for the possible interest rate has been reduced from orange to yellow.'

Woman at a desk with in out boxes marked Market Up Market Down.

"People are looking for stability in pension arrangements..."

'I'd put it on the back burner, but the stove's been repossessed.'

"It's going to require a great deal of money."

"You will be visited by three ghosts - the Ghost of Porfolios Past, The Ghost of Present Positions and the Ghost of Commodities Future."

'We're a non-profit organisation. We didn't plan it that way, but that's how it worked out.'

Lemonade - $500 A Glass! 'Yes, my prices high, but how else am I supposed to buy a Boulevart M109R? Certainly not on my allowance.'

An Everyday Explanation of the Federal Budget.

'The market shifted on me.'

"You never actually own a pension pot - you merely look after it for the next government."

'Looks like we'll have to break into the piggy bank to find our endowment funding.'

Man breaks piggy bank to find another smaller piggy bank inside.

'I use my Blackberry all the time to check the competition's executive bonuses.'

Reverse Mortgage.

"Unfortunately the first thing they cut was the stationery budget..."