Societal Satire Gifts

"I love you, you're special and though my key was stolen, perhaps you should maybe get back in the box."

"Everyone says I'm crazy and avoids me because I don't panic despite of corona, climate change or inflation. . ."

Politically Correct Snowperson

The prying mantis,

A small number of people are afraid of heights, but there is an epidemic fear of widths.

I'm not good with names but never forget a face. Of course, that's not very useful right now.

"Biff's old money, Angelo is new money and Boris is funny money."

"Yes, one is a dog."

"Brian's fine. He`s got his own coping mechanism."

"It was a holiday I'll never forget...I saw life in the raw!"

Begin this high fiber diet slowly. Too fast and your co-workers may complain of a greenhouse effect.

'We only serve menacing drunks here Sir, not small insignificant ones.'

"Well there's no way I'm going to say 'whom'!"

Horse statue throws off rider.

'Sure, I'm a working mother - is there any other kind?'

Department of No One Could Have Anticipated

The Vicar 's Invitation to Dinner.

"Adorable. Is yours a rescue too?"

"I'm after the history section."

"I prefer 'prostitute'. 'Media whore' implies that I'm not getting paid."

Inhospitality tent.

"These 'ordinary working class' types, I think my scout at Oxford must have been one."

"Pat's independently wealthy and dependably entertaining."

"Show me a man who's optimistic about the human race..."

"Congratulations! It's a pass."

"God help us, it's that guy."

Shawn considered himself a vegetarian by proxy.

'Next time you hear confession from that barmaid say, Tut-tut not COR.'

Attack Of The Guy From The Other Room

"It keeps me from looking at my phone every two seconds."

"I always wondered who got my transplant."

"Sometimes I have this awful feeling I'm really a West Side Person."

"All the better to ignore you with."

"Do you mind if I not listen while you talk?"

'I'm Anna Nicole Smith. But not THE Anna Nicole Smith!'