Societal Norms Explorer Gifts

"I wish you had gone to the trouble to evolve before meeting my parents."

'No, this isn't my son, the doctor. This is my other son, the one who didn't make much of himself.'

"It was a holiday I'll never forget...I saw life in the raw!"

"Lenny?" "Darrell?"

"I've been out of the dating scene a long time. Is kissing still a thing?"

'You don't have to be a boring bastard to work here but it helps.'

"Great coffee, Carole."

"We have to stop meeting like this – people are starting to talk ‘psychiatric ward.’"

'I know a lot of wives let themselves go when they're married- but AFTER the reception?'

"I know it's our first date and we're at this fancy restaurant and all, but would it be a red flag if I ordered the chicken fingers?"

'... So I said to Dave; 'You're not going to wear that baggy old thing are you?' But, he decided to come nude anyway.'

"Don't make eye-contact, don't make eye-contact..."

"He appears to be evolving differently to us!"

'I want a holiday that will impress the neighbours, which country offers most kudos to the Pound?'

"Maybe I will and maybe I won't - You're not prejudiced against transvestites, are you?"

"If being normal is so natural.....why is it such a strain?"

"He must be very secure in his masculinity."

'The effects of aging are inevitable. Either accept it, or inject it.'

'Look at big woosy Sid, pushing his pram with two hands!'

"I think they want you to leave it outside."

"We're going to be late for the awkwardly standing around."

'I pronounce you Wife and Man...'

"Since you don't know how to play house, you can be the dad."

'What are they all staring at - have I got two heads or something?'

"You've had to be kind to survive, and I've had to be nasty."

"Hey man, there are certain things called unwritten laws."

'Are you sure you don't want to marry me just because I'm a woman?'

'So unladylike!'

What are YOU looking at!?!?

'I've lost all my inhibitions.'

'So this is what you do while I'm away.'

"To be honest, I thought anarchy would be a lot more fun than it is."

"Whoops! – Autopilot."

"So close."

"Everyday, we give her 10 karma points for not using her bag to hog the seat beside her and everyday we take 10 away because she feels so smug about it."