Societal Norms Debunker Gifts

'Look at big woosy Sid, pushing his pram with two hands!'

'You don't have to be a boring bastard to work here but it helps.'

"I've been out of the dating scene a long time. Is kissing still a thing?"

'... So I said to Dave; 'You're not going to wear that baggy old thing are you?' But, he decided to come nude anyway.'

'I know a lot of wives let themselves go when they're married- but AFTER the reception?'

"OK, I know that this is borderline inappropriate, but just hear me out ..."

'I want a holiday that will impress the neighbours, which country offers most kudos to the Pound?'

"Maybe I will and maybe I won't - You're not prejudiced against transvestites, are you?"

'We have a strict dress code. Can't let you in without a straightjacket and tie.'

Victorian woman at a bar.

'It is Hyena. You said you wanted a fun fur.'

"It's very sensitive of you to realize that men like to get flowers!"

"I feel like such a failure...I'm almost thirty five and I should be on husband number two, and starting my third career choice by now!"

'-and stop saying 'who's carrying who over the threshold?''

A Woman Asking The Father's Permission To Marry His Son.

'Believe me, son, she's a much better choice for you than that skinny girl, Cinderella!'

'I seem to be very conservative but secretly, I'm a rebel - I don't wear pants.'

'The effects of aging are inevitable. Either accept it, or inject it.'

'I pronounce you Wife and Man...'

'Just who the heck are you to decide who's naughty or nice? Quit trying to impose your ideas of morality on everyone else!!'

"Since you don't know how to play house, you can be the dad."

'What are they all staring at - have I got two heads or something?'

"You've had to be kind to survive, and I've had to be nasty."

'So... shall I put you down as a Miss, a Mrs, a Ms or a miffed?'

'Are you sure you don't want to marry me just because I'm a woman?'

'Drinking or passive drinking table ?'

"No you weren't disturbing us, we were just having sex."

Woke Christmas - Consent form hanging next to a bunch of mistletoe.

'No, this isn't my son, the doctor. This is my other son, the one who didn't make much of himself.'

'I've lost all my inhibitions.'

'So this is what you do while I'm away.'

Guy comes to a funeral service with a bag of fried chicken.

In a bittersweet moment, Bill realizes he isn't actually the last person left on earth.'

Folie á Trois.