Social Norms Critics Gifts

'Drinking or passive drinking table ?'

"I've been out of the dating scene a long time. Is kissing still a thing?"

'You don't have to be a boring bastard to work here but it helps.'

'... So I said to Dave; 'You're not going to wear that baggy old thing are you?' But, he decided to come nude anyway.'

'I know a lot of wives let themselves go when they're married- but AFTER the reception?'

"OK, I know that this is borderline inappropriate, but just hear me out ..."

'I want a holiday that will impress the neighbours, which country offers most kudos to the Pound?'

"Maybe I will and maybe I won't - You're not prejudiced against transvestites, are you?"

'We have a strict dress code. Can't let you in without a straightjacket and tie.'

Victorian woman at a bar.

"I feel like such a failure...I'm almost thirty five and I should be on husband number two, and starting my third career choice by now!"

'It is Hyena. You said you wanted a fun fur.'

It says, "In lieu of gifts, please consider a donation to the automaker of your choice." Invite!

"It's very sensitive of you to realize that men like to get flowers!"

Al's Diner. No Tipping (wink, wink).

'-and stop saying 'who's carrying who over the threshold?''

A Woman Asking The Father's Permission To Marry His Son.

'Believe me, son, she's a much better choice for you than that skinny girl, Cinderella!'

"I'm tired of being the cockroach you want me to be and not the cockroach I want to be."

'The effects of aging are inevitable. Either accept it, or inject it.'

'Look at big woosy Sid, pushing his pram with two hands!'

'I pronounce you Wife and Man...'

"We're going to be late for the awkwardly standing around."

'Just who the heck are you to decide who's naughty or nice? Quit trying to impose your ideas of morality on everyone else!!'

"Since you don't know how to play house, you can be the dad."

"You've had to be kind to survive, and I've had to be nasty."

'What are they all staring at - have I got two heads or something?'

Woke Christmas - Consent form hanging next to a bunch of mistletoe.

"No you weren't disturbing us, we were just having sex."

Man in top hat at pedestrian crossing, sign says 'Don't dance'.

'So... shall I put you down as a Miss, a Mrs, a Ms or a miffed?'

'Are you sure you don't want to marry me just because I'm a woman?'

Guy comes to a funeral service with a bag of fried chicken.

In a bittersweet moment, Bill realizes he isn't actually the last person left on earth.'

'I've lost all my inhibitions.'