Social Satire Fan Gifts

'Of course the Johnsons got the big cloud.'

"You'd never believe it. I was replaced by a woman at work today"

Sitting Room, Standing Room Only.

Unbroken Eye Contact: The Musical

"New around here ?"

"Hey Brother, could you spare a dime?"

'The council is sending a Family Lifestyles Officer to monitor our behaviour patterns.'

"Only three hundred and sixty-seven followers? Maria's not an asset to the abbey."

'Those guys are flirting with me...will you please arrest the grotesque one?'

Friday 6 PM. . . It had been another long week for chewing gum man.

'Steward, this fellow hasn't spoken for a week. Be a good chap and feel his pulse will you?'

'You've not been panic buying shoes again?'

"Ted's flamboyantly straight."

'Better call me Sir in the office dear - I don't want the staff to know that I send my wife out to work...'

'In this society of clones Mike and I thought we'd be different and actually have a baby.'

Each morning farmer Ted had the unenviable job of sorting the wheat from the chav'.

'Ha ha! Look! It's Jimmy Smoking Mates...'

"Are you V.A.T. registered..?"

"Just because they've stopped telling us the Covid figures, it doesn't mean you can now go out flaunting yourself."

Contagion in Restaurants

"This won't affect my benefits, will it?"

"Surely you can do better. No one in our family ever married a dung beetle before."

"A touch more obsequious and you'll reach the tipping point."

"Worm puree? No, it seems the old lady was sh*tfaced again last night!"

"Sorry, I'm late. I was at Miss Huerta's house and I couldn't get away!"

"The boss was never that good with political correctness."

New Pandemic Social Trends. . .

'Uh oh. Wax moths! There goes the neighborhood.'

Generation X-Employed

Will work for pants

"You know, there are other emojis."

"I don’t remember there being a tip jar the last time we were here."

I'm used to seeing crocodile tears when I tell off a man in this bar, but this is the first time I've seen crocodile exclamation points. ! !

A man about to be caught with having an unfashionable patch on the bottom of his trousers

Social Agonies.