Fans Of Social Satire Gifts

Meet Jim, you've a lot in common...he's an insufferable bore as well...

"You know, there are other emojis."

Politically Correct Snowperson

"Brian's fine. He`s got his own coping mechanism."

A small number of people are afraid of heights, but there is an epidemic fear of widths.

'Of course the Johnsons got the big cloud.'

In my day, they didn

"I prefer 'prostitute'. 'Media whore' implies that I'm not getting paid."

The Vicar 's Invitation to Dinner.

"Only three hundred and sixty-seven followers? Maria's not an asset to the abbey."

Attack Of The Guy From The Other Room

'Next time you hear confession from that barmaid say, Tut-tut not COR.'

"I always wondered who got my transplant."

'Oh no! The sharp elbowed middle class!'

" ... and this is my wife - I'm legally obligated to tell you that."

'I wonder if you'd go out with me. I've always wanted to go to couples therapy.'

'I believe in the free enterprise system. I haven't paid for anything in the past 27 years...'

'I'll have the Chairman-of-the-board Lunch, and Dexter here will have the Sissy's Salad.'

"One trip to the dentist and look who's got the attitude!"

"You have to get up early tomorrow, too? We have so much in common!"

"But how many followers do you have?"

"Are you V.A.T. registered..?"

'Sorry I can't pay your pension until I see gray hair. . . Oh yes, and you also get disability.'

'Sorry, I only drink still wines. I don't have the patience to wait for bubbles to pop.'

"I know I say it in every episode, Carson, but the world is changing and we have to change with it."

"Hey, Gary. Lois wanted to know if you’re up for waiting forever for reheated leftovers and sipping warm mimosas intended to ease the pain of poor service amid a cacophony of idiot tourists and 20-year-olds... you know, brunch."

"If that's the chief medical officer I'm not here."

"Worm puree? No, it seems the old lady was sh*tfaced again last night!"

"Owww!! Yes, that hurts!"

'Uh oh. Wax moths! There goes the neighborhood.'

'Plastic surgeon' - 'Gift a give certificate to your ugly friends'

"I don’t remember there being a tip jar the last time we were here."

Meet Larry; tenor, baritone, philosopher, social commentator, sport analyst, political expert, relationship expert … and A+ certified plumber.

Al's Diner. No Tipping (wink, wink).

'He was too chatty. I don't like small talk. Too much gibber, not enough jabber.'