Social Observer Gifts

"I'm excited to leave this party we're going to."

"I take the fun out of everything. What do you do?"

'Have you noticed it, too?'

'Watch out for the... Ah, never mind.'

"Hello, police? I'd like to report some suspicious activity. A youth without a phone in his hand."

People in elevator avoiding each other by facing walls.

'Why don't you go and do your shopping, Irene, then Janet and I will have something to talk about.'

'You can't judge a person by his cell phone cover.'

Fountain of Youth and Fountain of Smart.

We all long to be long.

It might take a few years, but Pete knew that one day he would get to know the neighbors.

The International Association of Innocent Bystanders.

Yossi's mother couldn't understand why he was struggling socially.

"The Passive-Agressive Door-Holding Game:See if you can make an innocent stranger hurry from more than fifteen feet away while you hold the door."

New in town

'Did you ever feel like you were just the control in an experiment being carried out on somebody else?'

'Don't stare, woman. They're one of those poor, sad, childless couples.'

Body Language...

"I'm doing a paper on daylight as a trigger of politically incorrect language in men."

'Remember when we used to call them Wallflowers? The new term is Mingleberries.'

"What did you say your super power was again?"

CCTV camera reads over man's shoulder. He says: 'You do know how rude that is, don't you?'

The Crowded Streets

'Of course it's not easy to read the body language of someone who's basically inert.'

"And I'm sure you remember Sid and Monica... You know, the unhappy couple that doesn't know how unhappy they are?"

'How did you cope before 24-hour rolling gossip?'

"I always end up next to the weirdo!"

'Not very friendly, is he?'

Newly Non-Mega-Rich

Chatty, garlic-coffee breath, apathetic, contagious

'He's the sort of person who asks, 'How are you?' and then looks bored when you tell him.'

"Remember, when you get to London, don't smile or talk, avoid any kind of eye contact, or people will think you're nuts and you'll be locked up."

"Wonderful! This way I can go block after block talking to myself and nobody looks at me as if I were crazy."

They say there's more people sharing the experience of living alone.

'He has a doctorate in worrying.'