
'We've been spending too much time apart on our mobile devices, and we need some together time. Everybody log on to the family social media page.'
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'We've been spending too much time apart on our mobile devices, and we need some together time. Everybody log on to the family social media page.'
The Texter
Man and woman meet in bar, in strained poses. He says: 'Now we've met, can we drop the Myspace poses?'
No, you idiots, they don't include a "comments" section.
"Her first word was 'paparazzi'. "
21st century water cooler conversations.
'Someplace where we could take lots of selfies with national monuments...'
'Alas, poor Yorick, I knew you well. But dude, you're creeping me out, so I gotta un-friend you!'
'Being the boss's yes-man used to be easier. Now you also have to 'like' him on facebook, follow him on Twitter, link with him on linked-in...'
'I guess mother and baby are doing fine. She's already sending out selfies.'
Giving birth with your husband present may be more painful.
"Could you please focus on the objective of this meeting, Tom... you can get back to your 300 followers later."
Weird things I do because of the internet
"I forgot to take a pic of the tacos."
Digital Fomo!
"Waiter, can you heat this up? The wild salmon got cold while I was posting it to Instagram."
I put a picture of my lunch on Facebook, and nobody hit "like." Who doesn't like Slim Jims and beer?
"Before I do this, I would ask everyone to please delete the footage in the event of this not going as planned."
"What does it mean? Heck, I don't know! It's mystifying!"
"I always check twitter before work, to see if yesterday's joke got me the sack."
Updated Classis: Alice Through the You Tube.
'There's no art to the mind's construction on Facebook, Macbeth.'
"You really ought to cut down on your scream time."
"Your MBA and PHD are impressive but what concerns me is your low number of Facebook friends."
"And to my nephew, Todd, I leave my 27 Twitter followers."
Terry had a computer bug.
Trick or Tweet
"Amazon's new A.I. just 'gets' me."
"Where have you been? This content's not going to create itself."
Addicted to Facebook...lost internet connection.
Life on Earth - The original chat room.
I just hope my doctor is not on twitter too!
"Lori, I can’t talk right now — I’m right in the middle of updating my dog’s Facebook page."
"I'm being heavily recruited by several other companies."
"I always send a layover selfie back home, to let everyone know I'm safe."
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