Social Media Navigators Gifts

"My business is less bricks and mortar and more coffee shops and laptops. I sell NFTs."

'So you want an advance on your writer's block?'

"Hey, the neighbors just installed a new wifi router."

"It's not just him. The whole system's down."

"Mommy, watch, I'm living authentically!"

'You know, you can do this all online now.'

"Sinclair's not all he's cracked up to be. His reputation exceeds him."

"And for my next trick, I will confuse general politeness for chemistry."

"It's a beautiful day. I should go for a walk. . . Oh, now my neighbors are all out there."

"Honey, why don’t you tell Tony and Karen about your microdosing-healing-group thingy or whatever the heck it is?"

"If I had known how adult her place was I would have brought nicer beer."

The four housemen of procrastination

'He's a man of few works. He likes to talk, he just has a limited vocabulary.'

Cyber Dream

'I don't care if he is the most interesting man in the world, his tweets about what he had for breakfast are still boring.'

Books vs mobile phones

"Ok, so I just texted everybody my commencement speech."

"It's great the way that computer algorithms allow the internet to feed me with opinions that reinforce the ones I've already got - all on my phone!"

"If this is secret information the government doesn't want us to know, how come we can read about it on facebook?"

Books 'n' Carrots

I cannot tell you why men will not ask for directions

I'm filling out my myface.com and I have a question. Rudy Park, tech genius, at your service. Should I pretend to be 10,12 or 26 years old? 32? I configure browsers, not fake personas! I think I'll play for the Broncos.

"Social media makes it impossible to see, hear or speak no evil."

Traditional wisdom tells us that the brain takes on the shape of what it rests upon.

"Apparently it's demanding offerings."

'This is a simple proclamation-of-lack-of-interest date.'

Meet the Blogger - 1-3 AM.

"Oh, Johnny. I feel like I'm beginning to know you almost as well as Facebook does!"

Bubbies and technology

To tweet, or not to tweet - that is the question. Whether 'tis nobler in the mind to suffer the snark and the venomous replies of anonymous jerks

"Oh shut up."

"I love to watch cat videos on the internet!"

"Mommy uses emojis when she texts me bedtime stories."

"At Ermbruster Academy you son will acquire indispensible life skills."

"I assumed it was writer's block but as I've never written anything I could be wrong."