Social Media Mavericks Pillows

"Visit us on spacebook."

Lynching on social media

Selfie Stick

"Why would I want to meet Santa? I can just go home and log onto his social media page from the comfort of my bed."

'Tomorrow's special is fish, so wear the flounder suit.'

"I actually saw ten gay characters on television this week—which almost balanced out the 2,174 straight characters I saw."

Elevator Pitch

"We need to sue, claiming free speech is being violated by remotes with fast forward buttons."

"How's this for transparency: Our product isn't organic but our bullshit advertising it!"

"Did you ask the client about product placement?"

"Eye of Newt, wing of bat, let's instagram it!"

'We need to target the rich and stupid.'

'My market doesn't understand me.'

"Remember, Katie, genius is 10% inspiration and 80% media manipulation."

Smoke and Mirrors: Harold couldn't work out why his new store wasn't getting any customers.

'Our company needs a tougher image. So from here on out we'll answer the phone with the greeting, 'what the hell do you want?!'

'It's an emergency, Doctor. The vitamin company needs an endorsement.'

Like.

'We couldn't give away black-and-white TVs until we started advertising them as having 'non multi-color capability'.'

Entertainment systems

You trip on it, you buy it.

'I don't care if he is the most interesting man in the world, his tweets about what he had for breakfast are still boring.'

"My mommy suggested I try a different advertising approach."

"I think I know what your problem is. Not enough PR."

The Acme Agency: Dedicated to life, liberty and the pursuit of media exposure.

'And I say he makes us look bad when he rides around listening to those books.'

'Lucky for us, there's a sucker born every minute.'

'Hey! We've never tried a 'pity' strategy before...'

"Well, at least one of us passed the emoji eye exam..."

"Looks like he's coming around to our way of thinking."

"With your voice and my marketing skills, we'll sell records by the million!"

'This will be your territory, Bruno...get busy marking it.'

"Give a man a fish, you cut your throat. Teach a man to fish, you're a damn fool."