Social Media Afficionado Gifts

"I posted dozens of cat pictures on social media to meet women. Then one dated me and ran off with my cat."

"Look at my cat! Look at my food! Here are some pictures of me looking cool!"

"I caution everyone to avoid taking the first field reporter job that comes along."

'Someplace where we could take lots of selfies with national monuments...'

'Alas, poor Yorick, I knew you well. But dude, you're creeping me out, so I gotta un-friend you!'

'Being the boss's yes-man used to be easier. Now you also have to 'like' him on facebook, follow him on Twitter, link with him on linked-in...'

'As our new company logo, I'm not quite sure it's sending out the right message.'

'If only every year was an election year.'

'Let me see your portfolio of stolen ideas.'

'There's no art to the mind's construction on Facebook, Macbeth.'

"I love it when you use your 'All Things Considered' voice."

"You really ought to cut down on your scream time."

'Which sounds better: 'now with MORE XZ100' or 'now with LESS XZ100'?'

"I always check twitter before work, to see if yesterday's joke got me the sack."

'Just sitting around letting advertisers brainwash me. What about you?'

"Lori, I can’t talk right now — I’m right in the middle of updating my dog’s Facebook page."

How logos change over time.

"We need to sue, claiming free speech is being violated by remotes with fast forward buttons."

'It's creative as hell! Now that you've got that out of your system, give me a campaign that will sell.'

The Thinker?

They get into debt so fast these days...

Egguy JUMP!! 62 Eggs like this. Gr'Egg LOL. M'Egg OMG so funny!!!!! 3.

"We're looking for the kind of bad taste that will grab - but not appall."

Selfie World

Copywriter's blank paper compared to the gridded screen of a content provider.

"Then leave the horses head in the Futon." Middle-class mafia

Modern Life Blues

"The problem is that our ads have either been too Jewish or not Jewish enough."

Mafia Short-Term Memory Clinic. 'Fuhgettaboutit.'

"That's 'Help' with an 'H'."

You can't fool all of the people all of the time, especially with our advertising budget.

"Amen. Thanks everyone, oh and don't forget to subscribe!"

"There's nothing wrong with her. With e-mail, texting and tweeting, she just hasn't needed to learn to talk."

The statue of Apollo takes a selfie with the Venus de Milo.

"And the award for Best Product Placement in a Domestic or Foreign Film goes to..."