Social Drinker Gifts

Creation of Wine

'I don't know what you're complaining about. I should charge you for breathing my second hand smoke. This happens to be a very expensive Cuban cigar!'

"But, if I don't peel off the entire label, the label wins."

"Fascinating!"

'I pick fights when I get drunk.'

"It's good to get hammered by something other than the economy."

"I knew you'd like this place."

'Gin and Platonic' "Let's just be friends"

"Hey, keep it down, we're trying to have a conversation."

Join me in a beer?

"Swift Boat Veterans for Scotch"

'Honey, doubles with the Ryans always means Scotch.'

Pals

"Rum and coke...why, what do you drink on a fun run?"

'I'm looking for male bonding, but I'm a little rusty.'

'What's wrong with him?' - 'He drank a glass of water by mistake.'

'Man, you are the first parole office to truly understand me.'

Binge drinking

Just the one...

Diamond Geezer.

"I see you're playing the scotch game again?"

Missing: Wine Glass

"Tomorrow night let's switch back to gin."

"Charlie won't be here. He's drinking from home today."

"Do you realize that we spend one-third of our lives in bed and the other two-thirds in here?"

"Sir, would you mind changing places with me?"

I'm drunk and what I say can't go further than this table. It dies with me. I swear it. I don't hate Rudy. Not always. Sometimes I … Sometimes I … I don't not like him. Big news, Rudy.

Don't take it too personally - I just don't want a drink. Bar.

I just heard this is a non-profit bar. Since all profits go to charity, I plan to donate extra! I plan to donate my hangover.

Welcome to New Jersey. We don't pump our own gas, but we do pump our own beer.

What makes you think the waitress was flirting with you, Lance? Scotch.

"I gotta say: I admire his judicial temperament."

"Where do you see yourself in five pints time?"

"Now THIS is what I call a field trip."

"What's so funny about two monkeys in a bar?"