Social Drinker Gifts

Creation of Wine

'I don't know what you're complaining about. I should charge you for breathing my second hand smoke. This happens to be a very expensive Cuban cigar!'

"But, if I don't peel off the entire label, the label wins."

"Fascinating!"

'I pick fights when I get drunk.'

"It's good to get hammered by something other than the economy."

"I knew you'd like this place."

'Gin and Platonic' "Let's just be friends"

"Hey, keep it down, we're trying to have a conversation."

"Swift Boat Veterans for Scotch"

Missing: Wine Glass

"Tomorrow night let's switch back to gin."

Pals

'Man, you are the first parole office to truly understand me.'

'What's wrong with him?' - 'He drank a glass of water by mistake.'

'I'm looking for male bonding, but I'm a little rusty.'

'Honey, doubles with the Ryans always means Scotch.'

Binge drinking

Join me in a beer?

Just the one...

Diamond Geezer.

"I see you're playing the scotch game again?"

"Rum and coke...why, what do you drink on a fun run?"

"Charlie won't be here. He's drinking from home today."

"You're making my friend uncomfortable."

"You want your olive?"

"Do you realize that we spend one-third of our lives in bed and the other two-thirds in here?"

"Sir, would you mind changing places with me?"

"What's so funny about two monkeys in a bar?"

"I'll have a Maker's Mark, and she'll have a shot at being the mother she never was."

"Ignore gordon. He's had a snootfull."

"I retired today and took the lump sum."

"I thought I was a bottom feeder but we were nowhere near the bottom."

"Gin before peanuts is an aperitif. After peanuts it's a digestif."

"It's easy for me. Three beers and I'm in the zone."