Soccer Style Icon Gifts

"Do you do temporary ones that last about two weeks?"

"Me, a footballer. . ?"

Killer Executive Suits.

"I'm off to the gym, where my private self and my public self converge."

Two women wearing identical dresses head toward exchange window at department store.

Leadership suits you

"But don't let my wacky tie fool you. We actually take business very seriously around here."

Men's business romper.

Surfer Blowing Back His Hair.

"I'm not using my jumper as a goalpost, sir, I'm using it as a jumper."

'Go ahead and laugh, but I lose my keys less frequently than you do.'

Mrs Howell packs 200 changes of clothing for a 3-hour tour.

Football

A man is trying to play golf with a football boot attached to a stick.

'We need you to get onto those high balls coming over'

"And now. . . which shoes?"

'At least we look cool. Especially with the wind chill factor.'

Even good cholesterol can develop an unhealthy sports addiction...

Man admiring his patterned clothes in the mirror

'And at what stage did you realise the ball you were heading was on the TV?'

Ball as water-melon.

Designer Kangaroo Pocket

'What are the other nonconformists wearing this year?'

"Can you give me a haircut that says, 'If you mess with my budget I'll rip out your soul, wring it like a dish towel, and drink it from a teacup'?"

"I'm starting my own movement—Occupy Fifty-Seventh Street."

One of the Ten Best Hair Days of the Year

"This crucial pre-game drill keeps you focused and eliminates distractions!"

Vivienne Westwood

'Ouwth! Bid my tong!'

Children playing football.

1930's Lady.

Congratulations on the new you!

The Goalkeeper

"Gracie, I'm proud of you. Your team lost, but you tried your best and that's all that counts."

"You're fortunate. Stubble looks really good on you."