Soccer Savvy Pillows

Football merchandise - Replica bungs

Fly Football

'Sure beats your cupping your ear!'

"England losing from a penalty shootout again!"

Football Chameleon

The trauma of losing.

"Did you know that when my mom played soccer, only the winner got a trophy?"

'I don't understand why you always put me in goal?!'

'How many times have I told you not to hit the ball with your head?'

'Fancy a game of five-a-side, boys?'

A man is trying to play golf with a football boot attached to a stick.

"I'm not using my jumper as a goalpost, sir, I'm using it as a jumper."

My coach wants me to go to soccer camp. Focusing on one sport isn't good for you. But mom! I'll develop crucial life skills. Let's see. "Landing endorsements, agents and college sports scholarships." The definition of "crucial".

'Now that's the Group of Death.'

Ball as water-melon.

'And at what stage did you realise the ball you were heading was on the TV?'

Sport: Crisis in the Real Madrid.

United Football Club: In, Out, VAR.

'I know what you're thinking, are those legal shoes.'

Mohamed Salah

'I love doing things with you, Dad but couldn't you just coach my soccer team?'

'Oi, nobody gives me a kiss.'

Ascent of man from ape to beer swilling football lout.

'Not much gets past our new goalie!'

'I got a reverse hat trick. I let three goals in.'

'Why do they call him Neckline Ned.' - 'He's always plunging down the middle but never showing anything.'

'I've never seen so many strikers in one team before.'

"It evened out, for every free kick they got, we had one against us."

"Well I didn't see the incident myself.."

Watching the football.

"Before we begin. . . terms and conditions. . ."

"Okay...let's concentrate on discussing strategy during halftime."

"We've got the same ringtone!" (Two guys opening ring pull drinks cans).

We encourage the playing of games with other children.

Men can show their emotions!