Snooze Seeker Gifts

"O.K., Bud! Time's up!"

'The cats love getting some fresh air, and it's the warmed coat I've ever had.'

'It's normal, don't worry, people on the street just love patting puppies...'

"The bags under my eyes have combined to form some kind of face backpack."

The Snooze Bar.

"I'll get up in negative five minutes."

'Pretty please stay asleep till the morning,'

Whistler's father.

"Let's see if mom likes that super comfortable yoga mat we bought her."

'Thanks for the invitation, but I can never seem to find the energy to party...'

'Don't worry about it Dear: You know Daddy gets grumpy if he doesn't get his daily eighteen hours of sleep...'

"Damn! I keep waking up in the middle of the day."

Women pay for one hour of uninterrupted sleep.

Happy New Year! Hope you can stay up for it!

"That will be the gold standard by which all other naps are judged."

Drinks for the post-caffeinated economy

Power Nap, ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ!

"Do you have one that has a snooze button?"

"You're right...it's football strategy! I think I presented our financial proposal to the youth team I coach! I must get more sleep!"

"The sea waves on my sound machine are attracting a following."

Insomnia Clinic - On sale here: Tapes of the Senate's longest filibusters!

The Ultimate Sleeping Bag.

"For the perfect sedative, take the juice from a bottle of whisky..."

Doctor with Teddy - "Take this. It will help you sleep."

'Today: The collective unconscious...'

Eventual Motion Machine

How much for a blueberry scone? $3.25. I'll give you $1.20. Huh? $1.40. $1.45. It's not negotiable. Shrewd. $1.65. $2.00. $2.10. $2.25, but I want free shipping! Ebay addicts. $3 for your sandwich. $6.

'Wake up, Mr. Granger, the doctor will see you about your insomnia now.'

'That was a great meeting. No one woke up until it was over.'

What can I get you? A lemonade, and a scone for my avatar. No way. You have an avatar? Sure. Who doesn't? It's the hip thing. But that's just a movie concept. You're living in an imaginary kid world, right? If you say so. Okay, so one lemonade and one pretend scone. Real scone. For my real avatar. Don't let it get to you. How come I don't have an avatar?!?! You're cruel, lady. Give me my $5. Best money I ever spent.

"Before I prescribe a sleeping pill, I'd like you to try the opera."

A cat draws a picture of a sleeping man

"Right now, I'm between naps."

'This is your sleep aid. Take two of these at bedtime and stuff them up your husband's nose. That should stop his snoring.'

Ode to Rip Van Winkle.