Snob Aficionado Gifts

'You've been down the pub drinking that Serret Cabernet Sauvignon 2003 again, haven't you?'

"You'll love this. It's swarthy yet munificent, didactic and gregarious with hints of dogma."

"It better not be any of that over oaked chardonnay."

Not to be a motion picture. Will remain just a book.

Sign in book shop window: 'Critics agree the book is much better than the movie.'

"Everything taste so divinely artisanal."

Every time you make a blend, somewhere, a wine maker dies.

"I make it myself!"

'This wine is dreadful - try some.'

"The wine has subtle hints of expensive pretension, but it's balanced nicely by the screw cap."

"In our house the four major food groups are Bordeaux, Merlot, Chardonnay and Champagne."

Wine tasting

"When a wine rates over ninety, this is not alcoholism."

Sporting snobs talk about hunting on turnpike roads

'My husband will order the wine. He happens to be a graduate of the 3-Second Master of Wine program.'

'I may not know much about art. But, I don't know what I like either.'

"Pinot Noir, God's apology for White Zinfandel."

"House red, sir?"

'I'm a simple man really beneath the code words and the black ops and the multitude of fake passports.'

"It tastes and smells just like a glass of wine!"

Prosecco Drinker

When Pugs dream.

"It's an unpretentious little wine!"

"Herbert, don't! This is a gourmet coffee shop! You order instant de-caf and there's going to be trouble!"

"What wine goes best with vodka?"

"I think it is most admirable," said Alice, "that you gave up a thriving law practice to be with this lovely child."

'Dear, of course no one can tell you what they think of the wine, you haven't told them how much it cost yet.'

Gallery Guide

"I love craft beer! It's opened an exciting new world of snobbery for me."

"Yeah, he changed water into wine but it was nothing you'd want to lay down."

"I'm getting gnats, I'm getting cats, I'm getting dogs..."

"How much do you spend on a decent bottle of wine?"

"Riddle your salad with pepper, sir?"

'Listen my man, I am not being condescending, I am just trying to use words I think you may be able to understand. . .'