Sneaking In Pets Pillows

"Excuse me sir, no pets allowed!"

"Sometimes ... I just want to run away."

'Hey Harry, you know you've been walking around with a biscuit on your nose for the last two hours?'

"I didn't know she could body surf. Did you know she could body surf?"

A Vase has fallen on a cat's head. Are mice to blame?

"The article says there was a break-in at the museum last night. I don't suppose you know anything about that."

"But this time, Lucky, when I throw the ball... you bring it back!"

Cat Gets Hole in One.

'I taught him to shake hands, but I don't know where he got the joybuzzer!'

Dog Love.

"Listen, that's a Tang Dynasty urn we just broke."

The pet elevator: Because sometimes the pet steps are just too much work.

'Now don't forget, polar bears can be sneaky buggers.'

'Where'd he go, nurse?'

In Disguise.

"My boss says I'm very good at what I do."

He Did It!

Child plays football with his dog,football eventually squashes his dog

"I can't hear you. Are you playing with the dog again?"

How to scare cats.

'Doing tricks is a slippery slope.'

"Check this out! My ew app imitates the sound of the door bell and makes the dog go berserk."

Dogs must be on leash.

"Shake! Good dog."

"I thought you were teaching him to fetch, not kvetch."

"We were at the park and he kept on pretending to throw the ball then hiding it behind his back: After a while, I lost it!"

'Why does this crazy human keep throwing away my stick?'

"Oh, ignore that. Penny likes to play with laser pointers."

'He has a flair for the dramatic when I ask him to play dead.'

Hunting wildfowl

'Hey, Fred -- want to see a stupid pet trick?'

"Hey, stupid, what's up? What are you reading? Let's go for a walk, play with me, cook some food—how can you just sit there?! I adore you!"

"First of all, let's find out who blew the whistle on us."

'I told him to get down.'

'Twine's nice, but I prefer yarn.'