Snail Saver Pillows

"He went that-a-way." (snail escapes).

'Aaah...Are you the young man whose pet ate the snail bait?'

"Oh, look- French! Let's try it."

"I'm going to miss it when they stop warning us"

"Toadstool you say? No, this is snailstool now!"

Noise Pollution

'I got a big refund on my income tax.'

'Stress'

Murphy's Bed meets Murphy's Law.

On holiday...

'For sheer elegance you can't beat the black hole entropy formula.'

"The hardest thing about learning to tumble is the floor."

Snail with pc monitor.

"It's not a real company, it's a shell company."

'The escargots are underdone.'

'Love your renovations.'

Escargots to Go. 'I told you this would never work in the fast food market!'

Murphy bed...Murphy.

"So, you're staying in then?"

'You're lucky! Your teacher never gives you any homework.'

Cash Rebate

"I can recommend the snails, if you don't mind waiting."

'Let's face it, we're not meant to wear hats...'

"I need a slower internet connection."

"Derek has re-invented himself."

"It's about time the price of generic drugs went down! Oh, and give me fifty quick picks."

"I've been evicted."

An snail shell with a chimney

Don't worry, it's not broken: I'm an invertebrate...

A bunch of snails are in an office slacking off on their work . A co worker snail says:' Just a heads up. . .Jenkins is heading this way with a salt shaker!'

"Drinking home alone, I think he may have a problem."

"He's too ambitious, going for a black belt."