Snack Fairy Gifts

"I was going to share my cookies with teddy, but he's on a diet....so I had to eat them all."

Bowled over again!

"A retired superhero's re-purposed utility belt"

Heavy man sees 'Comfort Food' aisle

'Be honest. Does this double bacon cheeseburger with large fries and shake make me look fat?'

Vending machine: NO stress, only 50 cents.

We are shaped by what we love! Especially pizza and doughnuts!

"I want some long, thin square ones - for chips..."

"Wait, those crunchy, cheesy little fish thingies are free?!"

Honest Vending

Super Heroes.

This is a great game --- All except for that blimp. It keeps reminding me I've already broken my diet resolution. Pizza. Chips.

Love is when you watch television together.

"There are no croutons. I use tater tots on my salad."

"Tragic case of having the fridge from the TV when the World Cup is showing."

Vending machines with junk food: 'Zing!', 'Zoom!' and 'Crash!'

"The bagels are better in New York."

"You were right, I didn't want to stop."

Psychiatrist says: 'Oh, no! Not another fruit cake?'

"Sometimes, Cheryl, I wonder why you only invite me along to cocktail parties."

"Wait, has thou brought snacks?"

"With the prices they charge these days I can't afford to throw a pie or can off beer at the ref."

'As you're pregnant, I suppose you are eating for two? Or don't you want to cut down that much?'

"Nice try, Mom, but I'm going to go with a caterer."

'I'm going to try that 'vegan' thing, Joe -- give me some beer nuts.'

'We have a P-O-P display for our new perfume. Can we move the beef jerky down a smidge?'

'If it's a universal remote, how come it doesn't work on the refrigerator?'

'OK, the worn out carpeting proves I snack too much. Only one thing to do. Tomorrow I get prices on hardwood floors.'

The feeding frenzy has begun, gorging ourselves on bowl after bowl of college football.

"My parents won't allow sugar in the house, so I've had to learn about it on the street."

Stupid Microwave

'Kudos to Bill for the cotton candy machine idea!'

'Him' Watching the Game to Relax

"I like to use new Bible words. Let's beseech Mom for cookies."

Cookie Surveillance