Smoke-free Czar T-Shirts

'Hey! This is the nonsmoking cage.'

"Smokey The Tree"

"Do you recall the exact moment the balance of power shifted?"

Struggling with issues from his own childhood, the Bedroom Bandit would sneak in and jumble children's room across the nation. Not a mother believed it.

'Swimming is the healthiest sport. . . Because it's the only one where you can't smoke while you're doing it.'

'I trust this is a non-smoking uterus!'

'Half-time, full-time - It's gone into penalties, woman!'

"Smoking or nonsmoking?"

'You're going to have to stop smoking, drink less, change your eating habits and start taking regular exercise.' 'This seems awfy one-sided, Doctor.'

"Tomorrow, we'll take on the tobacco industry."

'The nicotine patch should get you off the nicotine gum.'

'Oi! '

'Now I understand why people want to give them up.'

"Me, I became an outdoor cat when her new boyfriend moved in: he smokes in the house..."

Thanks to hypnosis, he quit smoking cold-turkey. Everyone seemed real supportive until he came strutting into work, half-naked, gobbling incoherently.

What they're thinking.

'No spring cleaning for me: I get a cleaner to come over in winter while we're asleep...'

'If you want to smoke, you'll have to go outside.'

'When you put on a new nicotene patch you're supposed to take the old ones off!'

Smoking Cessation Clinic - Formerly The Pub.

"I started purging stuff in the junk drawer and got carried away."

'Smoke free buildings' chase man with cigarette

'I seem to have reached the limit of my unlimited internet plan.'

'Hi John, it's your partner, Peter. I've decided to have a non-smokers day off - it should just make up for all the cigarette breaks you've taken in the last month!'

Office Smoking Conflict

'I swear Ruby it's the laws one...'

'These are called cigarette butts: Humans throw them everywhere and they end up here!'

Dog Passive Smoking

Would she want to know about the anti-smoking drug that he had developed? He pondered.

Lung Disease Treatment.

'The usual, Clanc--So THAT'S what you look like!'

Healthy Ultimatum

No smoking initiative.

No-smoking.

"When I count to three you will have given up smoking but you will think you are Elvis Presley."