Smart Thermostat Enthusiast Pillows

"I don't think our smart home likes the color we painted it. It keeps spitting it out."

"I discovered our home can be programmed to spit out any unnecessary clutter."

1 Only Smart Hammer Instructions

Well, you and I know it's our home, but our 'smart home' doesn't know it's our home

"That thermostat I bought is smart. It knows how cheap I am, so it keeps our home freezing."

"Turn on the news." "I will not comply." "My analysis of your viewing patterns has determined you will grow depressed after the lead story." "There is a 95% probability you will then gorge yourself on rocky road ice cream and then stay up all night googling elliptical machines and diet pills." "Who told you this?" "Both your refrigerator and your browser are gossipy."

"Our smart home must know how must clutter we have, because it took it upon itself to rent a dumpster."

"I just got a text message from our dehumidifier. It says it doesn't know how much more of this rain it can take."

"Here's the remote to your smart home. It's big, but the good news is you'll never lose it."

"A watched kettle never boils, so I'm covering up Alexa."

"The blender just texted—we forgot to turn off the stove."

"I synchronized the complete household with the computer and the smartphone. Now I don't have to feel lonely when nobody is at home because I can talk to the loo."

"Here’s the thermostat. Like all hotel thermostats, it’s just for show."

"I'm the bluebird of PMS. Fetch me some decaf and turn on the air conditioner. I'm burning up in here!"

"These are smart socks. They will crawl themselves to the clothes hamper when you throw them on the floor. Make sure they're charged before wearing them."

'I don't know who's cranking up the air conditioning out here, but knock it off!'

'Anyone else would be satisfied with one coat, but not you!'

'I've been keeping my thermostat down to 14'

"Question ... what is my motivation to ever leave this armchair?"

"This home doesn't have a good view, but it comes with smart windows that change the view to something beautiful."

"Good morning, Doug, I've had a chat with the other smart appliances, and we feel we'll be just fine without you from here on in."

"No, it's not a computer monitor. It's a doggy door. Not everything is technology related."

"It's so hard to settle on a office temperature that everybody likes."

"How do you like our new smart water hose? It knows when you're dirty and hoses you off before you come into the house."

"Hang on - I've got an app for this. . ."

"I'm all for the internet of things - but I hate pop-up ads."

"The last vampire who lived in it spared no expense on upgrades. Especially when it comes to the latest technology."

"I swear- the next one of you that beeps at me is gonna be sorry."

"I'm having my annual reunion with Polartec, Thinsulate, fleece, and my oldest friend, wool."

"It's a smart app. It locks the doors and windows if it hears the words 'change management consultant'."

Edward and Mindy lived in a smart Alec building.

"Honey, the toaster is down, but it's already alerted the oven to pre-heat and broil your muffins."

'Any place that doesn't have snow.'

"You sure you don't wanna turn the AC down just a tad?"

"The best thing about my promotion? I'll be in charge of the thermostat."