Smart Home Curator Pillows

"I hate this smart refrigerator."

"I've got a smart phone, a smart car, a smart TV, a smart doorbell, a smart kettle, a smart heating system and a smart meter. . .In fact, the only thing that ISN'T smart is ME. . . !"

"There's smart phones and smart cars, so why can't there be smart rooms that clean themselves?"

"Once I connect with my server over there, I can turn my lamp on and off."

"I have an imaginary friend called Fred, and my dad has one called Alexa."

"I don't think our smart home likes the color we painted it. It keeps spitting it out."

"I think our smart home is suffering from separation anxiety. It's following us."

"The smart toaster is down, and it took our wifi, security cameras, and entertainment systems with it."

"I think you put too much healthy food in our smart refrigerator. It's about to spit it all out."

"You are still here."

"I discovered our home can be programmed to spit out any unnecessary clutter."

"Between you, Alexa, and Siri, I'm just in a house surrounded by women who think they know everything."

1 Only Smart Hammer Instructions

Well, you and I know it's our home, but our 'smart home' doesn't know it's our home

"That thermostat I bought is smart. It knows how cheap I am, so it keeps our home freezing."

"This is one of her more important paintings from her early period."

'We'll take two sets, for upstairs and downstairs.'

"Bootsy has welcomed the vacuum robot into our home in her own unique way."

Caliologist

"Turn on the news." "I will not comply." "My analysis of your viewing patterns has determined you will grow depressed after the lead story." "There is a 95% probability you will then gorge yourself on rocky road ice cream and then stay up all night googling elliptical machines and diet pills." "Who told you this?" "Both your refrigerator and your browser are gossipy."

"Our smart home must know how must clutter we have, because it took it upon itself to rent a dumpster."

"For the last time...I'm Alexa, not Siri! Get it right, moron!"

"I just got a text message from our dehumidifier. It says it doesn't know how much more of this rain it can take."

"Here's the remote to your smart home. It's big, but the good news is you'll never lose it."

"This universal remote is awesome. It controls the tv, cable, stereo, computer, garage door. . ."

"Our smart home sure is sensitive. Every time I hammer a nail in the wall it screams."

"A watched kettle never boils, so I'm covering up Alexa."

"The blender just texted—we forgot to turn off the stove."

"I synchronized the complete household with the computer and the smartphone. Now I don't have to feel lonely when nobody is at home because I can talk to the loo."

"Here's the new smart plant...it tells you when you're overwatering it."

'Good grief! Our house is so 'smart' it just refinanced itself!'

"I'm a home-tech specialist. Your daughter called us. I'm here to convert her doll house into a smart doll house."

"Hey Google, describe the view."

'Say - according to our home computer, we're out of bread.'