Smart Appliance Collector T-Shirts

"I feel stupid calling tech support for a toaster."

It's a male thing - I saw a toaster with power assist, and I bought it.

You're telling me not to choose sides between Google and Apple. Precisely. Computer Villa. Stay neutral. Continue to support both companies. Emotionally. Right. By buying as much as you can from both companies. Doesn't that only benefit you? Heretic. Absolve yourself by upgrading your phone! Computer Villa.

"I had an Android, then I switched to an iPhone. Then I went back to an Android, then I switched back to the iPhone. . ."

"Mom said eat everything in moderation, so I renamed the cookie jar 'Moderation.'"

'Here comes Mr. 'Smarter-then-you'.'

As you like it - One way of catching fish

"Please feel free to browse."

Why Running Away Together Is Not a Very Good Idea...

In case of emergency...break glass: Crisis Manual.

'I don't know if artificial intelligence in a toaster is a good thing. It just seems to make toast whenever it feels like it.'

"Relax. I've come for your toaster."

Girl who has been bought an oversized chatelaine large household items hanging from it

'You've got irritable bowl syndrome.'

He sold appliances.

Automatic conscience clearer

Cuckoo blender

The cannibal's version of a vending machine.

Bananas eye the blender

"I'm in way over my head"

'Yes I suppose it is a bit more fiddly than a crooklock...'

"My 'smart' doll doesn't say much, but she sure is a good listener!"

'Plus I found this great set of porridge bowls!'

'I should never have run off with him.'

"And how exactly am I supposed to peel the carrots when we don't even have an electronic multiblade adjustable potato peeler?"

'It's pop-up toast rack.'

'Remember when, if we needed a new toaster, we just took our money out of one bank and put it in another!'

Receiving the early-Morning T-Mail

'Novelty utensils to go with my satellite dish! Cool, huh?'

Early Battering Rams

Selfie sticks growing on trees.

Home Appliances Marathon

'Do you have a silent can opener? I have 3 dogs who pile all over me.'

Sign # 22 that security concerns have gone too far: Toasters that are password protected.

"You're getting toast, not waffles. Our appliances have been hacked, and the refrigerator is planning our meals."