Small Businesses Gifts

How's business?

Feces on a stick (huge street vender fly selling shit)

Balloons vs. Rockets

'Look what the government's doing for the small shop keeper...giving them lower counters.'

"I've worked for the government for more than 30 years so I understand the challenges small businesses face. I've created most of those challenges."

Origami Shop - Business Folded Due To COVID-19

"Is this to make me feel bad for not getting you that laptop?"

'It seems every time my business grows so does my paperwork!'

"I thought we agreed you weren't going to work at home."

"We're a very small international conglomerate."

'We've financed three more startups for no fathomable reason.'

Ice Cream And Summer Rentals

"I know it's misspelled, but market research shows that cute sells."

'I treat everyone here the same as my family. . . like s**t.'

"Al, you've been chosen Businessman of the Year by the Junior Chamber of Commerce."

"Mom, will you help me take down my drawings? I'm selling my catalog."

Miniature Design Shop: Think Small.

Expenses/Income. "Our only problem is working out how to switch these."

Businessman sees sign in window of 'Fred's Chili Bowl' restaurant: 'Now Hiring a Bean Counter'.

Dog selling toilet water on front lawn

"I'd love to help out but I'm barely keeping my head below water now."

'This wasn't what I meant by viral marketing...but if you can get it to work.'

Money pouring in for a 'Acme Doodad Company's IPO.

"Can I talk to someone who knows something?"

"It was a mom-and-pop, but we inherited it."

The Small Business Advisor: 'The first bit of advice I'd give you for your garage start-up is to tell your dad'

'Running your own business means being self-made, unfortunately it also means finding out what you're made of!'

"We're going to have to think outside the box to boost sales, minion."

"I'd say business was brisk."

A Specialty Bookstore Chain that Failed, 'Untitled Books.'

"Business is so bad even my hotcakes aren't selling like hotcakes."

"I'll have the usual."

"We're still the same, great company we've always been, only we've ceased to exist."

At the printers - "Business is booming I need 6 more business cards, ASAP."

"Forget lemonade. The real money's in bottled water."