Small Biz Whiz Gifts

"The tariffs on produce are killing me."

A child stands behind a stand piled high with snowballs and a sign that reads "Hand-crafted snowballs 25¢".

"You were right. Building an online business empire is even more fun than playing games."

Miniature Design Shop: Think Small.

'Keep asking for more allowance. It's good practice for negotiating future stock and option grants.'

A young boy sits behind a lemonade stand with a sign that reads "Lemonade 25¢ - Jay Antosh, Chief Executive Officer".

'Those are my twins: NASDAQ and Dow. They were born at the height of the dot.com boom.'

"I'm worried. We're small enough to fail, but not big enough to be bailed out!"

'We would deliver if we could cross the street.'

"Sorry, sweetie, but I have the conference room booked for the next hour."

'This is a very dysfunctional company. No one will talk aboaut about the elephant in the boardroom!'

'I'd love to play house, Kevin, but I've got a business to run.'

Kid selling lemonade has a picture of the founder: himself

An overachieving headless chicken.

'I applied the instant rebate and the returning customer loyalty reward, so that comes to fifty cents.'

"Is there any way we can skip right to adulthood and start being in charge?"

Student about Biz Quick class: 'It's bite-size information in a 15 minute class that teaches you how to roll in the dough.'

"I can see you and I'm still too busy."

'Well, Dad, you said for us to use our initiative to make money so we went into the worm business.'

"No personnel expenses, low manufacturing costs, no turnover tax - according to financial experts my enterprise is worth 859,0000,0000 euro."

"We have to develop a new way to build our customer base. Antispam software has put a dent in our marketing strategy."

Kid's Lemonade Stand Has A High Pricing Policy

'Not a shed, just a shop.'

It's time for a corporate shakeup. You squeeze, I'll stir.

'Sure I can do same day service.'

You did a hostile takeover of the corner lemonade stand? Why not? It's operated by Timmy. He's seven. He's a big boy. By seven, I had three ice cream carts. Besides, I made his investors an offer they couldn't refuse. We'll split the six free espressos. Waaaaah!

'Our market analysis is in.'

"Fantastic business concept! I'm sure with that we'll convince the bank to give us a 87,000,000 Euro loan!"

"With expenses like ingredients, supplies, marketing, packaging, handling and payment processing, a cup of lemonade costs $50."

"Sorry, Mom. Sorry, Pop."

Road kill - Foreign competition beating US auto domination.

Small business nurturing employee health insurance.

'I'm from the odd shaped glass supply company.'

'Did you hear about the Ant and the Grasshopper? -- Some Japanese Beetle bought them both out.'

'It's 50c per glass, or 50c per share to invest in my company.'